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The Funniest Jokes That'll Speak To Every "Star Trek" Fan's Inner Nerd

Live long and prosper, Trekkies.

BuzzFeed Contributor

If you've found yourself watching the Star Trek franchise on repeat, or effortlessly quoting one of the show's characters regularly, chances are you're one of the die-hard fans.

No matter if you started watching from the beginning, or just love the series in general, we've rounded up the funniest social media posts that'll speak to every trekkie's soul. check them out below:.

Dayton Ward 🖖😎 @daytonward There's no party like landing party. #StarTrek 01:07 PM - 18 Sep 2017 Reply Retweet Favorite

Evil Girafe 👁 @Lyrical_Girafe Same vibe. #Startrek 03:47 PM - 10 Oct 2021 Reply Retweet Favorite

Jay Stobie @StobiesGalaxy There's been a late addition to the crew of William Shatner's Blue Origin spaceflight... 🦖 #StarTrek 06:25 PM - 12 Oct 2021 Reply Retweet Favorite

soph @neonriddler star trek ds9 is one big meme 10:20 PM - 16 Sep 2021 Reply Retweet Favorite

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Which Star Trek joke or meme would you add to this list? Let us know in the comments!

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225 Hilarious Star Trek Jokes That’ll Have You Beaming with Laughter

• 5 months ago

As the great Captain Kirk once said, “Boldly go where no one has gone before.” In the vast universe of humor, our exploration knows no bounds. These Star Trek jokes are not just a diversion; they are a cosmic connection, transcending star systems to unite us in the universal language of mirth. Join us on this interstellar journey where the final frontier is a canvas for laughter painted with the brightest hues of hilarity. Let’s go over these jokes about Star Trek now.

Table of Contents

Best Star Trek Jokes

Embark on a quest for the best Star Trek humor. Our collection of the Best Star Trek Jokes guarantees a warp-speed journey through the wittiest quips and punchlines. Prepare for an unforgettable voyage into the galaxy of laughter.

If Spock has pointy ears, then what does Scotty have? Engineers! What illness did everyone on the Enterprise catch that made them red and itchy? Chicken Spocks! How do you stop yourself from falling out of a Bird of Prey? You have to Klingon! Did you hear about the Klingon’s plan to wrap the Enterprise in silver paper? Luckily, the plan was foiled! When Star Trek fans go to a convention, they always get a gift. It’s called the enter prize! I accidentally went to a Star Trek convention dressed as Chewbacca from Star Wars, What a Wookie mistake! A Klingon and a red shirt get into a fight; the Klingon misses every shot, but the red shirt dies anyway! How do you say where is the bathroom in Klingon? nuqDaq ‘oH puchpa”e’ The Star Trek crew couldn’t use the internet outside of WiFi range. They didn’t have commander data with them. What does every Star Trek fan ask for from a mobile network? Unlimited Data. If I have a son I will name him Data, after Mr.Data from Star Trek. If it’s a girl, we’ll pronounce it Data. Lessons learned from Star Trek: Nemesis. Always remember to backup your Data. What did Mr. Spock find in Captain Kirk’s toilet? The Captain’s Log! William Shatner, Star Trek’s Captain Kirk, is said to be extremely disappointed after the collapse of his recently launched women’s underwear business… Apparently, nobody was interested in buying ‘Shatner Panties’. What would Captain Kirk be called if he wrote poetry? Prose and Khans. What did Captain Kirk do when his girlfriend told him she had a defecation fetish? William Shat-on-her. Why did Captain Kirk take such a long time in the washroom? Because he was fighting the Klingons. What’s a star trek fan’s favourite drink? Picardi and Kirk. Captain Kirk told his girlfriend he was into scat… …then he Shatner.

Funny Star Trek Jokes

Light up your funny bone with our irresistibly Funny Star Trek Jokes. Engage in a cosmic celebration of humor that transcends star systems and leaves you in stitches. These jokes are not just funny; they’re light-years ahead in hilarity.

Wat do you get when you cross a Tribble with a Vulcan? A very furry pet that’s highly logical about shedding! Why did the Ferengi open a bakery on the Enterprise? Because he wanted to make some “profit”able treats and finally prove that “dough” is the universal language! How does Worf take his coffee? With honor, of course, but he prefers it “Klingon Strong” enough to wake the dead! Why did Captain Picard go to art school? So he could learn how to “make it so” on the canvas, and he’s been boldly painting ever since! What’s the Klingon’s favorite game? Worfleball! It’s like baseball but with more honor and fewer strikes! When a Bird of Prey falls out, how do you stop it? You just have to Klingon. Approximately how many ears does Mr. Spock have? There are three. The left ear, the right ear, and finally a final front ear. How do you refer to a Cardassian on a sailing ship? A sea-Gul. What is the Borg’s favourite place to eat? BORGer King! Have you heard about Kirk’s upcoming wedding? He engaged the Borg! Have you heard about the Captain of the Enterprise? He had a one trek mind! It takes how many Ferengi to change a light bulb? One for changing and the other for selling the broken one. How does one become a Star Trek fan? They Klingon. On Vulcan, how are glasses called? Spocktacles! Two science officers getting into an argument is referred to as what? Science Friction! The Romulan crossed the road for what reason? To conquer the other side! The Borg crossed the road for what reason? Because it assimilated the chicken! Spock crossed the road for what reason? Because it was logical! Mr. Scott crossed the road for what reason? Because his transporter beam wasn’t working! How do you describe a Klingon with half a brain? A genius! What is the best way to get a one-armed Klingon down from a tree? Wave to him! The Enterprise had to be repaired at the garage. Why? It needed new Spock plugs! Can you tell me which breakfast cereal Sisko prefers? Quarker Oats! To change a light bulb, how many Borg are needed? All of them, because they are one!

Hilarious Star Trek Jokes

Prepare for a laughter supernova with our collection of Hilarious Star Trek Jokes. Delve into a universe of wit and charm where every punchline is a celestial delight. Get ready to giggle your way through the cosmos.

Star Trek characters make the worst sports fans… They always root for the away team What do all Star Trek captains have in common? They all have three ears. A left ear. A right ear. And a final frontier. Where do you keep your badge at a Star Trek convention? On a Lanyard Nimoy. Where do Star Trek fans work out? At the He’s Dead Gym. Have you heard about the new Star Trek Christmas movie? It’s The Wreath of Khan. I used to confuse Star Wars with Star Trek. It was a Wookie mistake. A storm trooper and a red shirt are in a room. The storm trooper shoots the red shirt, but misses every shot. The red shirt dies anyway. My wife said she would divorce me if I kept quoting Star Trek. So I said, “Number Two, make it so!” My libertarian neighbor posted a newspaper ad selling his collection of Star Trek ships. And here I thought he believed in free Enterprise. I’m a bipolar Star Trek fan. I just went to the hospital to have my dilithium level checked. An Avatar: The Last Airbender and Star Trek crossover? ATLAST! I like Star Trek… …But it has its’ pros and Khans! The creator of Star Trek was renowned for emptying his bowels in obscure places. He would boldly go where no man had gone before. Star Trek fans always expect a gift when going to a convention They call it the enter prize. I can’t decide if I want to watch the original Star Trek of The Next Generation… I guess you could say I’m stuck between a Spock and a Picard place! What’s Gillian McKeith’s favourite part of Star Trek. Captain’s Log. Ricardo Montalban struggled to find acting roles after “Star Trek 2.” Nobody wanted to hire an ex-Khan. Joke I just thought up: What did the orphan say to the Star Trek fan thinking of adopting? Bring me up, Scotty! I don’t always seduce hispanic Star Trek fans… but when I do, I prefer dos Trekkies. Why did the trekkie spit out her latte at the Star Trek Convention? Cause William Shatner Coffee.

Short Star Trek Jokes

In the realm of quick-witted quips, our Short Star Trek Jokes reign supreme. Unleash the power of brevity with jokes that pack a punch in just a few parsecs. Short, sweet, and cosmically funny.

What’s the difference between a Klingon and a grapefruit? One screams “Qapla’!” when you squeeze it. Why did Data cross the road? To prove he could. How many Ferengi engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? Four. One to hold the bulb, and three to argue over who gets to rub it for luck. What’s the Vulcan motto? Live long and prosper… maybe. Why did Worf get banned from poker night? He kept folding chairs. What’s the Borg’s favorite karaoke song? “We Are Family.” How do you know Geordi is lying? His lips are moving. How many replicators does it take to make a sandwich? None, but it’ll need a good therapist afterwards. Why did the Tribble cross the galaxy? To find its mother… wait, no, that’s a different joke. What did Captain Kirk say after he accidentally beamed himself into the engine room? “Scotty, beam me up a new pair of pants!” What do you call a Klingon who loses his temper in a library? A hush-Qa’pla’! What’s the difference between a Romulan and a chameleon? A chameleon can blend in. What’s Picard’s least favorite Shakespeare play? Much Ado About Naussicaans. Why did the holodeck malfunction? It got a case of the seven-year itch. How do you know Worf is telling a joke? His face cracks. What’s the best way to make a Ferengi blush? Hold up a mirror and say, “There goes your future profits!” Why did Q join the stand-up comedy circuit? He needed a new way to mess with humanity. What do you call a Vulcan with insomnia? A logic sheep. What did Spock say when he saw a Romulan decloak? “Oh, there you are again.” What’s the fastest way to get a promotion on the Enterprise? Get assimilated by the Borg.

Star Trek Jokes One Liners

Boldly experience the hilarity of succinct wit with our Star Trek Jokes One Liners. Each joke is a comedic photon torpedo, delivering laughter in the most efficient and side-splitting manner possible.

You think you’re evolved because you have warp drive? I can snap my fingers and turn you all into salamanders! Data: I have analyzed humor and determined that the following statement is objectively funny: “Why did the chicken cross the road? To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.” Picard: Engage! … Wait, wrong button. Make it so! Image of Captain Picard from Star TrekOpens in a new window. Worf: Today is a good day to die… especially if it gets me out of another Shakespeare recital. McCoy: I’m a doctor, Jim, not a miracle worker! But I can prescribe you some shut-up pills for Wesley. Geordi: My visor can see through walls, but it still can’t figure out what’s going on in Wesley’s head. Riker: Beam me up, Scotty! And this time, please not the transporter room ceiling. Troi: I’m sensing strong emotions from Captain Picard… mostly annoyance at Wesley. Crusher: Nurse Ogawa, another Red Alert headache for the Captain? Just tell him it’s just another malfunctioning holodeck program. Guinan: Qapla’? Don’t mind Worf, he’s just practicing his stand-up routine. Scotty: I cannae change the laws of physics, Captain, but I can make the warp core sing “Bohemian Rhapsody.” Seven of Nine: I have assimilated all human humor. Now, please explain this “knock-knock” joke. Bashir: Quark, I’m prescribing you a new therapy: one hour of listening to opera with Worf singing along. Jadzia Dax: The Tribbles are multiplying again? Don’t worry, Worf, I have a solution involving a bat’leth and a very small transporter setting. Garak: So, Captain, did you enjoy my latest novel? It’s a heartwarming tale about a tailor who falls in love with a replicator. Odo: I have apprehended the perpetrator. It was the potted plant in Engineering. Seems it had a gambling debt with Quark. Neelix: Today’s special on the mess hall menu: replicated Klingon gagh! Don’t worry, it’s been safety-rated… mostly. Paris: Tom, remind me again why I agreed to fly this shuttle with Neelix as navigator? Kes: Captain, I think I’ve discovered a new planet entirely made of… chocolate! Chakotay: The Kazon are attacking! Prepare to repel them… with interpretive dance! Kim: Ensign Kim reporting for duty, sir. Ready to solve any problem, no matter how small. Even if it involves filing 10,000 TPS reports. Tuvok: Captain, my meditation has revealed a disturbing truth: Wesley is secretly plotting to take over the ship. Torres: Don’t mess with the Chief, people. She can weld a mean subspace antenna and sing karaoke like a Klingon opera star. Archer: Engage! And someone hand me my phaser rifle. These Xindi aren’t going to terraform Earth without a fight. Sisko: Prophets, give me strength. Dealing with Bajoran politics is harder than battling the Dominion.

Clean Star Trek Jokes

Embark on a family-friendly journey through the cosmos of humor with our collection of Clean Star Trek Jokes. These jokes are as pure as dilithium crystals, ensuring laughter without any warp-speed bumps.

Why did the Borg go to therapy? They had assimilation issues. How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three – a left ear, a right ear, and a final front ear. Why don’t Starfleet officers ever gossip? Because they know how to keep things under wraps. What’s a Ferengi’s favorite type of music? Gold records. How many Vulcans does it take to change a light bulb? None. The light bulb is logical and will repair itself. Why did the Starfleet officer bring a ladder to the bar? Because he heard the drinks were on the house. What did Captain Picard say to the barista? “Tea, Earl Grey, hot.” Why do Klingons never play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when you scream “Qapla’!” every time you find someone. Why was Data a terrible stand-up comedian? Because he couldn’t grasp human emotions. How many Borg does it take to change a light bulb? All of them. Resistance is futile. Why did the redshirt go to therapy? He had too many unresolved issues. How do you know when Spock is lying? His ears are not the only thing that’s illogical. Why did the Klingon bring a pillow to the battle? To have a soft landing when he got knocked out. Why don’t Starfleet officers ever get lost? Because they always follow the captain’s log. What’s a Ferengi’s favorite fruit? Profit-berries. Why did the Borg refuse to play cards? They considered it irrelevant. What do you call a Klingon who’s good at math? An algebra’K. Why did Captain Picard become a gardener? He wanted to make it so plants would grow. Why did the Starfleet officer bring a red marker to the mission briefing? To mark important points. Why did the Vulcan go to the comedy club? To study the humans’ sense of humor. Why do Starfleet captains make good detectives? They always follow the prime directive. What’s Worf’s favorite game show? Wheel of Fortune, because it has a Klingon! Why did the Tribble apply for a job at the bakery? It wanted to be kneaded. What’s a Ferengi’s favorite board game? Monopoly, because it involves acquiring property. Why did the Borg go to school? To improve their assimilation skills.

Dirty Star Trek Jokes

For those who prefer humor with a bit of warp in it, our Dirty Star Trek Jokes are ready to push the boundaries. Brace yourself for an cosmic ride that’s sure to make you blush…or burst into laughter.

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They both circle Uranus looking for Klingons. My conservative Christian parents sent me to one of those massive youth group events that celebrates how cool it is to be a virgin Joke’s on them, I went to the Star Trek convention next door instead Boy: Dad how come there are no Jews, Christians or Muslims in Star Trek? Dad: Cause it’s the future son Anomalous heat reading off the starboard bow, setting an intercept course! I’ll chase you ’round the moons of Nibia and ’round the Antares Maelstrom and ’round Perdition’s flames before I give you up! So Lieutenant. How about I show the meaning of Torpedo – full spread? Although it is illogical, I am afraid you have emotionally compromised me. Hello, I had sensors scanning for sexy lifeforms and you where the only one they could find. How about I slip into something more comfortable.. like these star trek voyager pajamas baby!

Star Trek Jokes for Adults

Dive into the more mature side of interstellar humor with our Star Trek Jokes for Adults. These cosmic quips are tailored for a grown-up audience, offering a hilarious journey through the saucier side of the final frontier.

Why did Captain Kirk apply for a job at the bakery? Because he wanted to boldly roll where no dough has gone before. What’s the difference between Star Trek and my romantic life? In Star Trek, redshirts die; in my love life, relationships do. How does a Starfleet officer party? They go where no one has gone sober before. What’s Captain Picard’s favorite kind of music? Heavy metal. Make it so! Why did Seven of Nine go to therapy? To deal with her assimilation issues. What do you call a Vulcan who just won the lottery? Logical. It’s the only logical response. Why did Geordi La Forge break up with his girlfriend? He couldn’t see a future together. Why did Worf start a rock band? Because Klingon music is always on the “disruptor.” What’s a Ferengi’s favorite adult beverage? Quark-ila Sunrise. Why did Dr. McCoy become a stand-up comedian? He wanted to boldly go where no joke had gone before. Why did the Borg start a landscaping business? They wanted to assimilate new plants. What do you call a Romulan who can’t keep a secret? A failed spy. Why did Deanna Troi become a chef? She wanted to explore the emotional depth of flavor. What’s the Cardassians’ favorite party game? Truth or Detain. Why did the holodeck malfunction during the poker game? Riker accidentally programmed it for strip poker. Why did Odo refuse to go to the costume party? Because he was tired of shape-shifting all night. Why did the Starfleet officer break up with the replicator? It couldn’t satisfy his emotional needs. What do you call a Bajoran who’s always late? A procrastinatoran. What’s Captain Janeway’s favorite cocktail? A Warp Core Breach – it hits you at warp speed. Why did Q get kicked out of the comedy club? His jokes were too omnipotent for the audience. Why did the Tribble start a jazz band? It wanted to be part of the purr-formance. What’s a Borg’s favorite pickup line? “Resistance is futile; you will date me.” Why did the time-traveling crewmember go to the therapist? They had issues with the present. Why did the Enterprise crew always carry extra shirts? Because you never know when a diplomatic meeting might turn into a shirtless negotiation.

Star Trek Jokes for Kids

Introduce your young ones to the lighter side of the galaxy with our Star Trek Jokes for Kids. A cosmic concoction of age-appropriate humor that will have your little cadets beaming with joy in no time.

Why did Worf join the bridge crew? He heard they were looking for a number one! What do you call a grumpy Trekkie? A Grumpy Star. How do you know Geordi is telling a lie? His visor twitches. What’s the Vulcan motto for kids? Live long and play fair! How many Tribbles does it take to fill a bathtub? No one knows, because they keep multiplying! What did Captain Kirk say after he accidentally beamed himself into the kitchen? “Scotty, beam me up a new sandwich!” What do you call a starship shaped like a pizza? A Star-za! What’s the best way to make a Ferengi smile? Tell them they found a free latinum bar. What do you call a Romulan who tells good jokes? Uncloaked and funny! Why did the transporter chief get in trouble? He kept beaming people into the wrong uniforms! What’s the difference between a Starfleet uniform and a disco ball? A disco ball reflects light better. What did Data say when he saw a Borg cube? “Resistance is futile… but maybe we can talk about it?” Why did Worf get banned from the holodeck? He kept setting the difficulty to “Klingon warrior” and destroying everything. What’s the best way to make friends with a Tribble? Scratch its belly (but don’t let it multiply!). What did Captain Picard say after the ship hit a space rock? “Red alert! And someone bring me a space dustpan!” Why did Data join the debate club? He wanted to learn how to argue logically, even without emotions. What’s the fastest way to get promoted on the Enterprise? Get assimilated by the Borg… and then defect back to Starfleet! What did the transporter chief say after beaming someone into a wall? “Oops, that wasn’t the turbolift button.” How do you know Q is telling a joke? He’s actually being funny for once! What’s the best thing about exploring space? All the new friends you can make… even if they’re aliens! What did the crew do when they ran out of replicator rations? They had a Tribble stew… just kidding! Why did the Borg stop trying to assimilate the Ferengi? They couldn’t figure out how to make a profit from them. What did Captain Janeway say after losing a game of poker to Q? “Make it so I win next time!” What’s the most important thing to remember when exploring space? Never leave home without your sense of humor! Why are Star Trek jokes so great? They’re boldly going where no joke has.

Star Trek Jokes and Puns

Engage in a voyage through the cosmos with our Star Trek Jokes and Puns. These wordplay wonders will have you chuckling at the clever connections between space and jest. Get ready for puns that are out of this world.

Did you hear about the Captain of the Enterprise? He had a one trek mind. What do you call two science officers having an argument? Science Friction. Did you hear about the Federation weapons expert? He never forgets a phaser. What is Commander Riker’s favorite hobby? Sewing, because Captain Picard is always saying “Make it so.” Why did Riker die from friendly fire? Because Picard ordered “Fire at Will.” What are glasses called on planet Vulcan? Spocktacles. Did you hear Kirk reciting verse at Warp Speed? It was poetry in motion. Why did the Romulan cross the road? To conquer the other side. How do you get a one-armed Klingon out of a tree? Wave to him. What did the first officer say when Captain Picard asked him why he let Troi win at cards? Because I Riker. Where do the Borg go to eat fast food? Borger King. Why does this Star Trek uniform stink? William Shatner. How does a Romulan frog stay camouflaged? He uses a croaking device. Why did Worf change his hair color? It was a good day to dye. What did Scotty say when little shards of ice began hitting the Enterprise? “Captain, we are being hailed.” What space illness makes you red and itchy? Chicken Spocks. What was the potato’s favorite sci-fi show? Starch Trek. Where does a ten-foot Mugato sleep? Anywhere he wants to. Why did the chicken cross the road? To boldly go where no chicken had gone before. Did you hear about the Klingon plan to wrap the Enterprise in silver paper? Luckily, the plan was foiled. Why did Spock cross the road? Because it was logical. What’s a shark’s favorite science fiction TV show? Shark Trek. Why was Captain Picard so confused when the android disappeared? Because they’d lost their Data. Why did the Enterprise have to go to the garage for repair? It needed new Spock plugs. What’s it called when a crew member on Deep Space 9 runs as fast as he can? Worf Speed.

Final Thoughts

As we navigate the celestial expanse of laughter, our cosmic quest reaches its zenith. We invite you, fellow cosmic jesters, to share your favorite Star Trek jokes in the comments below. Let the laughter ripple through the galaxy, creating a celestial symphony of joy. As we beam out from these jokes about Star Trek, may your days be filled with interstellar joy and endless cosmic chuckles. Remember, the galaxy is vast, but laughter has the power to bridge even the farthest stars. Live long, laugh often, and may your humor always be warp-speed!

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10 Greatest Star Trek In-Jokes

This article was delayed because we got chatting to Morn.

Jack Kiely is a writer with a PhD in French and almost certainly an unhealthy obsession with Star Trek.

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Star Trek: Discovery » Funny Moments

Funny moments in Star Trek: Discovery .

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• While debating whether the destruction of a Federation communications relay was a random mishap or an act of malice, Saru insists that it must be malicious, fully expecting Burnham to disregard his concerns. While she does needle him for his paranoid tendencies, Burnham states that she agrees with him (much to Saru's surprise). Georgiou remarks to the bridge crew that both of her senior officers agree on something and asks to have it noted in the ship's log.
• Saru complains that he can't get a solid lock with the ship's sensors to determine a mystery object's nature. Burnham's response is to physically crowd Saru off of his own station to read the sensor data out loud (mostly just giving off its position relative to Shenzhou ). Saru bumps Burnham back out of the way and states that he cannot determine anything useful about it, as opposed to just reading numbers off of a screen like anyone could do. One gets the impression of a pair of bickering siblings, with Georgiou filing the role of an amused parent. (The smirk on her face and the above comment about how rarely Saru and Burnham agree on anything suggest that this isn't the first time that she's watched a scene like this play out.)
• The officers wonder how they can get a fix on an object in the star system's debris ring (later revealed to be the Klingon beacon) when the ship's sensors cannot lock on. Cut to Burnham, Georgiou, and Saru using the telescope in the captain's ready room to zoom in on the object visually.
• Saru protests Burnham's plan to EVA out to the object due to the hazardous radiation. His description of the effects that it would have on her very genetic makeup should be terrifying, except for his choice of words for how her genes would unravel: Burnham : [mock terror] Like noodles?!
• Georgiou suggests, for the sake of safety, that Saru should accompany Burnham on the EVA, only to watch both of them immediately protest: Burnham feels that bringing him along would only add to the risk, and Saru doesn't want to go. Georgiou: And you, Mr. Saru? Are you equally happy not to be put at risk? Saru: Oh, on any occasion, Captain.
• Ensign Connor narrating Burnham's EVA launch like an airline flight. It only adds to the Tear Jerker factor when Connor is later killed during the battle in the following episode. Connor: Commander Burnham, this is Ensign Danby Connor. On behalf of Captain Georgiou and the entire crew of the U.S.S. Shenzhou , we'd like to welcome you to flight 819 with non-stop service to the object of unknown origin . The temperature outside is a brisk -260 degrees Celsius . We are forecasting some mild debris , but anticipate a smooth ride .
• The Reveal that Georgiou had her and Burnham tramp around the desert to make an enormous Starfleet logo in the sand to signal the Shenzhou . After all, if you're going to call for a rescue, why not do it in style?
• Admiral Anderson dryly suggests that Burnham should, in the future, avoid disturbing ancient cultural artifacts belonging to warrior races that the Federation hasn't dealt with in a hundred years. Given how frequently "disturb dangerous ancient artifact" was a plot line in previous shows, he's wise to make the suggestion.
• Sarek, while conferring with Burnham via hologram, manages to lean against a piece of furniture in her quarters. Either the software running the hologram is smart enough to adjust for differing room layouts to avoid Sarek clipping through a table when he sits down, or Sarek and Burnham have the exact same furniture layout.
• Sarek has some parting advice for his adopted daughter/protege just before he leaves. Sarek : [under his breath] Behave.
• Cue the monster leaping out of the shadows and killing the Klingon, while the away team hauls ass in the other direction.
• Also funny is her "distraction": [The monster breaks through the door and looks at the people near the other door.] Burnham: [calmly] Hey. [She shoots it three times and it turns its attention to her] Burnham: [under her breath] Shit , that worked ! [She turns around and runs like a bat out of hell towards the ventilation system.]
• He then entirely kills the moment by offering Burnham some fortune cookies.
• Do note that, through the entire ominous start of this scene, you can clearly hear his pet tribble cooing away.
• Well, it's those...or tribbles just aren't interested in sugared and baked wallpaper paste with horrible quotes, rhymes or puns stuffed in them. Which is just as funny .
• This also serves as a bit of Self-Deprecation on the franchise's tendency to nonsensically turn the lights off during serious meetings.
• When Stamets protests Burnham being on the away party, Lorca asks Saru to assess his former crewmate. Saru : She is the smartest Starfleet officer I have ever known. Lorca : [to Stamets] Huh. And he knows you.
• Cadet Tilly is a spaz, full stop. About 90% of Burnham's responses to anything at all she says is basically a Flat "What" .
• If anything, the joke is even funnier when The Last Jedi did basically the same joke with a Forced Perspective close-up of a clothing iron.
• Tilly brings in a package for Burnham. Tilly: This was sent for you. You were in the shower when that ping went off and that's how I-I was fully clothed so I thought I-I'd save you a trip to the depot— Burnham: Tilly.... Tilly: Yes. Well, less extraneous words.
• After Stamets takes a skull fracture that nearly damages his frontal lobe, he dismisses it as "overrated" as it only controls memories and emotions. Dr. Culber decides to save it anyway, "just in case you decide to have a feeling one day".
• Poor "Ripper" gets (mis)named that by Landry (because that bug is not really aggressive if left to his/her own devices)...and, then promptly rips her apart when she gets overly belligerent and way too cocky when trying to get a "sample" while Ripper isn't as far under the anesthetic as she thought. It's rather darkly amusing .
• Stamets is jealous that Ripper the Giant Tardigrade can somehow communicate with the spores. Stamets: Well, that's unfair. I always wanted to converse with my mushrooms.
• Burnham thinking she can flatter Stamets into agreeing with her about the tardigrade's condition. He twigs on immediately. Burnham: Lieutenant Stamets. Your spore drive is genius. Beyond genius. What you've achieved for the war effort, for the whole of science itself, it's a contribution... Stamets: I know I'm brilliant. What are you trying to get out of me?
• For the very first time in any canon Trek series: Tilly: You guys, this is so fucking cool! [ Beat , as Stamets has an expression on his face similar to what longtime Trek fans probably had at that moment] I'm so sorry. Stamets: No, Cadet. It is fucking cool.
• Mudd is outraged that Tyler and Lorca conned him .
• Tyler repeatedly punching L'Rell probably sends some mixed messages if you understand Klingon courtship. Of course, understanding Klingon courtship leads to her prior abuse of him making a certain unsettling sense as well.
• Tilly accidentally insults Michael, implying that she has no personality, and instantly backtracks as she tries to keep up with her.
• During Lorca and Tyler's training exercise , the last part of the simulation involved a double column of Klingons running down the hall while Tyler easily gunned them down. It looks hysterically funny, as if Tyler modded the simulation just to run up his score.
• Burnham and Tilly argue over what Tilly should have for breakfast.
• When Burnham and Tilly are exercising, the background music sounds like the main theme — remixed through an old Game Boy.
• The food stations on Discovery helpfully provide nutritional information on the meals ordered.
• Fridge Brilliance to go along with your dose of funny: When Tilly and Burnham meet Tyler, Tilly flounces over and starts talking to Tyler in a very familiar manner, a person to whom she has never been introduced . In most cultures, it would be considered very presumptuous, but she kicks Burnham under the table when Burnham doesn't shake Tyler's hand when he introduces himself to her.
• Stamets' exposure to the spore drive in the previous episode has apparently mellowed him out to the point he acts like he's on a permanent high . Well, he is taking in shrooms...
• Michael responds to “are you really that crazy?” with a Fascinating Eyebrow . Stamets takes that as a yes.
• Or it'll be revealed at some point that disco's no longer dead (which, given next episode's party, isn't so far-fetched).
• Burnham has to go into Sarek's mind to try and save his life, but in his injured and distressed state, Sarek is disoriented and acting on defensive instinct. Which is to say that he angrily turns on her and hadoukens her out of of his head .
• Burnham wants to talk to Sarek about why he lied to her about why she wasn't accepted into the Vulcan Expeditionary Group. Sarek finds several excuses in rapid succession to avoid the discussion. Burnham leaves, promising that they will have that discussion some day, pointedly referring to him as "Father." The look on Sarek's face afterwards can best be described as "Why me?" Sarek: Renowned diplomat, but not scoring so hot on the "Father of the Year" competition.
• The dread and horrible challenge known as...a party.
• On that note, Stamets' "I just saw the hottest guy over there and he's in a band " to get Tilly out of his hair.
• Tilly mentions that she used to be into soldiers, but now she's into musicians. Spotting Tyler walking over, she declares that her soldier thing is back .
• Tilly and Stamets as Shippers On Deck for Tyler and Burnham. Even with Stamets explicitly having an agenda since he needs Tyler's help and Tyler won't listen to him but will listen to Burnham.
• Before they get caught in the loop, Stamets is shown as acting like he's totally stoned due to his genetic alteration.
• The "WTF?" look on Burnham's face when Stamets hugs her after they collide in the corridor. And then Stamets saying to Tyler "You're a very tall man" for no good reason.
• Bonus points for a visibly confused Dr. Culber valiantly trying to do damage control for "filters off" Stamets.
• Lorca's commentary on how a gormagander will get so caught up with feeding that it forgets about mating: "That's as depressing a trait as I've ever heard."
• Mudd's beautiful line on Starfleet ships. Mudd : There really are too many ways to blow up this ship. It's like a design flaw.
• Watching this again after The Reveal about who Lorca really is, what he's done, and what he's still planning to do makes it even funnier.
• Mudd's spacesuit has a helmet that looks like a ridiculous ant head with big eyes and antennae. Word of God is that it's styled after the Andorians, but with wildly exaggerated features.
• Tyler then requests to provide security oversight. Lorca: "I still don't give a damn."
• Every time Saru tries to explain that the Space Whale is not a fish, Lorca just stares at him.
• Just the fact that the alien is straight up described as a Space Whale .
• There's something darkly humorous about Mudd's pained "dammit I gotta do this all over again" expression when Burnham vaporizes herself and he can't then sell her to the Klingons. There's more than a little of a "why go to all this painful trouble, you *know* I can just undo it, right?" vibe to it.
• Stamets comically screwing up the Trust Password with Burnham. Though it's set up seriously when she's whispering in his ear, the next reset he just walks up to her and blurts out "You've never been in love!" without preamble. Burnham understandably reacts as though he's on drugs. note  Which, in his defense, he sort of is.
• In the same scene: "Dance with me. For Science! "
• And making a snide comment about "Random Communications Officer Man", making it explicit how the average Red Shirt is viewed in this franchise.
• "CAPTAIN MUDD??"
• "I never thought I would say this, but I'm actually tired of gloating."
• When the crew put the unexplained plan into action: Mudd enters the bridge, Lorca greets him as "Captain Mudd," and stands to offer him his chair. Mudd is seriously wigged out by this and suspects that they are trying to con him again ( He's right , and at the same time has no idea .)
• The way the heroes finally win the day: They call Mudd's wife and she promptly comes to take him off of their hands. It brings to mind Trelane and his parents in TOS.
• And it turns out the song is a remix! It's actually Wyclef Jean 's "We Tryin' To Stay Alive", which, to be fair, would also be considered "classical" music.
• Once they've managed to defeat the Klingon cloaking device, Lorca orders a massive volley of photon torpedoes unloaded at the Ship of the Dead. Just before giving the order to fire, he gives himself a fresh dose of the medication which treats his sensitivity to light. Evidently, just so he could watch the explosion.
• Tilly's first attempt at impersonation causes her to turn into a sputtering mess, so she has to get Lorca to pretend to be the chief engineer and bail her out. Lorca chooses a strange but familiar Scottish accent to disguise his voice with , much to the amusement of the bridge crew.
• His tone is what sells that line. Of all the awful qualities the Terrans have, that is what Saru chooses to be judgemental about, their lack of creativity ?
• Mirror!Connor's reaction to the above warning is a grin which could be interpreted as more admiring of Captain Killy's ruthlessness than intimidated by it.
• Mirror!Tilly's uniform features a low-cut breastplate, in comparison to Burnham's more conservative attire. Tilly quips that her mother would approve.
• To get into the Captain Killy mindset, Tilly tries going into Sir Swears-a-Lot mode, calling the Terrans they're about to meet "assholes" and bossing around Discovery 's bridge crew. Lorca approves. He'd know!
• After a brutal knife fight in the turbolift, Burnham kills Mirror!Connor and chucks his corpse onto the ISS Shenzhou 's bridge. The bridge crew's reaction? Slow Clap . Black Comedy at its finest.
• Emperor Philippa Georgiou's overly long list of cognomens is as impressive as it is hammy : Mother of the Fatherland, Overlord of Vulcan, Dominus of Kronos, Regina Andor, Emperor Philippa Georgiou Augustus Iaponius Centarius.
• Burnham compliments the food served at the Emperor's table, and is visibly distressed to learn that she's eating the Kelpien the Emperor made her choose earlier.
• Burnham, standing before the Emperor, tells her that she isn't Michael Burnham, Captain of the Shenzhou and adopted daughter of the Emperor, but rather her double from the Prime Universe, offering Captain Georgiou's Starfleet badge as proof. As soon as the Emperor verifies her story, she kills her entire court without warning, save for one Lord, who she offers the governorship of Andor if he can keep this information secret - and clean up the bodies .
• Even though he's an amoral bastard with no loyalty to anyone but himself, Mirror Stamets earns a chuckle for trolling his prime counterpart in the mycelial network. Prime Stamets: What is this? Am I dead? Is this the afterlife? Are you some sort of narcissistic Virgil leading me to judgment? Mirror Stamets: Yes, Paul. You've been wrong about everything. There is a God, and she's very, very mad at you right now. (starts cracking up) I totally had you for a second there! You can't deny it! (laughing) You should've seen your face. I mean, our face. Hoo! That was classic.
• How does Prime Stamtets shut out Mirror Stamets while talking to Culber in the mycelial network? Prime Stamets: Computer, play Kasseelian opera. The aria [Culber] loves, the one I hate.
• Lorca declares that Mirror!Stamets is now less useful than he is dangerous to keep around , and states that he's going to throw Stamets into the Mycelial Core, which he feels to be a fittingly poetic death . Then he promptly declares that he hates poetry, and has Stamets shot instead. Lorca: Just kidding, I hate poetry.
• The fact that the Emperor has a trapdoor in her throne room just to throw people into the ship's energy core. Which, naturally, gets used within a few scenes of being introduced, just for the obligatory establishing of its existence .
• Mirror!Landry's last words: An audibly nervous question about whether the core's containment field is up or not. Note: Her hand is resting on the containment field's control panel.
• Before that, Lorca is doing a big speech on how he survived death by being sent to another universe.
• After learning about Lorca being replaced by his MU counterpart, Admiral Cornwell is so angry she disintegrates his bowl of fortune cookies with her phaser. The following camera cut shows Michael, Saru, Stamets, and Sarek sitting around the table the bowl of cookies had been in the center of, with Burnham's wordless look saying volumes about the gesture .
• Sarek and Mirror!Georgiou engage in Snark-to-Snark Combat over Burnham, essentially arguing over which was the better parent to their respective versions of Michael. Sarek claims victory by pointing out his version of Burnham saw through Lorca. This whole argument is funnier when you recall that Sarek's defining trait on this show is that he's a terrible parent, making this victory of his amusingly petty.
• Georgiou then proceeds to mock Tilly's ginger curls. For the subsequent away mission, her hair is straightened out. One might wonder if this is only for a better crook disguise.
• When she gets mad, he points out she was asleep and he's an Orion . She concedes the point.
• When she realizes she's carrying a bomb, she calls Burnham and immediately admits to being high before explaining the problem.
• After he finishes up, he mentions that the Klingons didn't respond to him with hostility because of the novelty of meeting a human who could speak Klingon. Tyler describes it as being akin to seeing "a dog on water skis."

     Short Treks Season One 

• Tilly orders a quadruple-espresso with milk alternative (which comes out as a single shot, meaning it's quadruple- intensity , not quadruple- servings ). The replicator warns her against her order: Replicator : Ill-advised. That amount of caffeine is not- Tilly : Is my best friend. So shush.
• Of all the things to happen after a *Drool* Hello , probably the last thing that you'd expect is for all of the replicators in the galley to go ballistic, bombarding the hapless Tilly with a barrage of food. With the replicators helpfully describing each meal item as it is sent flying across the room. The replicators seem to be particularly excited to announce "French fries!"
• During a tense standoff with the Runaway, the alien is distracted by her discovery of ice cream. Tilly : [sotto voice] And how did you subdue the alien presence, Ensign Tilly?
• After the second or third time that the Runaway bristles at Tilly's approach, Tilly responds in kind by hissing back at her, thus beginning their Snark-to-Snark Combat .
• Tilly explains away the mess in the galley without revealing the Runaway's presence by claiming that it was caused by a "hormonal space-rabbit." One with mood-swings.
• We see Craft, unconscious and drifting in an escape pod playing Betty Boop cartoons. Zora later notes that he had watched the same video over eight hundred times. Craft explains that he couldn't figure out how to turn it off.
• There's a short bit where Zora introduces Craft to various 23rd century human cuisine. For Taco Tuesday, Zora explains to Craft what a Taco is. Craft's next question is to ask what a Tuesday is.
• When Craft and Zora are watching Funny Face, Craft munches popcorn from a Starfleet-branded popcorn tub.
• The opening credits set the tone, as the standard intro gets interrupted by a burst of video distortion before the title card displays, with the theme music replaced by a disco remix.
• Also: The flashback is cued with Mudd abruptly staring off into the middle distance as the camera does an exaggerated Dissolve . After the flashback, Mudd admits that he may have been in a similar situation once .
• Another flashback shows Mudd trying to talk his way out of a similar situation with an Orion man, who is rather taken in by Mudd's fast-talk, before an Orion woman storms in and reminds her partner that the cell has a (very obvious, with a helpful bright red "recording" light) security camera letting her see the whole conversation. Mudd tries sweet-talking her, only to get tased.
• A couple of times, Kritt seems taken in by Mudd's lies, only to laugh in his face. At one point, Kritt asks if anyone has ever fallen for his claims.
• The Reveal that Mudd has been posing as a masked female bounty hunter, selling android duplicates of himself to various dupes who try to cash in the bounty with various Starfleet crews who have obviously become quite familiar with the routine. One ship, the USS De Milo , is shown to have a storage room full of Mudd-droids, and the officer who receives Kritt is not thrilled at having to deal with another one. The droids then break out into a rousing chorus of "If I had any money, I'd be sipping jippers on a beach somewhere!" Either the androids are so poorly-programmed that they'll readily blow their cover with the right prompting, or Mudd deliberately programmed them, when their cover was already blown, to break out in a low-key musical number just to twist the knife that extra bit. Either way, perfectly in character and ridiculously funny.

     Season 2 

• The Facial Dialogue of the rest of Discovery ' s bridge crew during this is priceless . Burnham gives Pike a look that says "Sorry about this", Rhys visibly struggles to keep from laughing out loud, and Saru shakes his head in annoyance.
• And then Tilly mistakenly puts Pike's file up on the viewscreen. Pike takes it in stride, even pointing out his failing grade in Astrophysics at Starfleet Academy.
• Pike issues orders to his new bridge crew as they prepare to investigate the mysterious signal. Pike: Rhys, charge phaser cannons. Bryce, start transmitting standard Federation greeting. Owosekun, Saru, Connelly, Burnham, scan what you can. Detmer...fly...good.
• And then they drop out of warp into an Asteroid Thicket , with no sign of the red burst they were chasing. Pike: I was expecting a red thing . Where's my damn red thing?
• Pike tells Nhan to "get your Red Shirt into a spacesuit." Her life expectancy just dropped precipitously, didn't it, especially since the scene is more or less an homage to the "orbital skydive" in Star Trek (2009) , which killed a Red Shirt just to prove they would. Nope, it's the arrogant Blue Shirt who doesn't make it.
• While the landing party is attempting to navigate to a crashed ship on an asteroid surrounded by a ridiculously dangerous debris field that's about to crash into a pulsar, Detmer discovers that the material surrounding them is subject to spontaneously exploding. Saru has his danger-sensing ganglia suddenly emerge when that's announced. When he sees a crewmember staring at him... Saru: Really? Are you surprised?
• Pike is in mortal danger, and Burnham tries to reassure him: Burnham: Trust us, Discovery has you. Right, ladies? Detmer: [nervous] Oh, yeah! Owosekun: [frightened] Absolutely!
• Burnham informs Commander Jet Reno of their current situation: Burnham: We're on a collision course with a pulsar. Reno: Oh, what a relief . I thought you said we were all gonna die.
• Reno is what happens when a Starfleet engineer internalizes the reputation that Starfleet engineers have . When asked how she kept her patients alive despite being an engineer rather than a doctor: Reno: Body's just a machine. And I read.
• Reno learns that the Klingon War ended while she was shipwrecked. Reno: [ Beat ] No one's speaking Klingon so... we won? Burnham: There was an armistice. We're at peace. Reno: An armistice with the guys who drink blood wine?!
• Pike's hilariously awkward "Bless you" to Linus.
• Tilly, as part of her command training, is put in charge of reallocating Discovery 's resources, and gives Stamets a new lab by moving someone else into an utility closet. Tilly: I'm drunk on power.
• Stamets intends to transfer to Vulcan, but he has one last piece of advice for Tilly: "Talk less."
• Saru also fumbles a bit when dropping ranks means he only has the one name to offer, no surname.
• The gravity simulator initially appears to be a heavy disk the size of a manhole cover, requiring two crewman to carry and position. Then as soon as they activate it, everyone scrambles out of the way as it unfolds into a massive apparatus the size of a small shuttle, like something out of The Jetsons .
• Tilly talks to the sample of the dark matter rock she has collected, and it abruptly releases a shock wave that sends her flying into a stack of crates.
• Tilly's observation of the dark matter's disproportionate weight, noting not only that a very small rock crushed a table, but that it was awesome to see it do that.
• Tilly has her own version of "if at first you don't succeed, try, try again." Tilly: If X doesn't work, try Y. If Y doesn't work, try Z. If Z doesn't work, try drowning your ineptitude in a Risan mai-tai!
• May, a crewmate who has attached herself to Tilly, is possibly even more spazzy than Tilly (of course, she might be a figment of Tilly's imagination, considering that May has been dead for some time already).
• Tilly's method of getting Detmer on board with her plan: Detmer: For the asteroid to exit at the correct angle, I'd have to execute a sustained circular drift. Tilly: A donut. You'd be doing a donut in a starship ! Detmer: That's true. [begins grinning like a maniac]
• Pike, recovering from a phaser wound to the ribs, warns Burnham not to make him laugh. Burnham: Fortunately for you, I was raised on Vulcan. We don't do funny . [Pike chuckles, then winces in pain] Burnham: Maybe I should just shut up.
• Especially since it comes off as a bit of Self-Deprecation in response to the... complicated reception of Discovery ' s fundamental premise, the Spore Drive.
• And after Pike's astonished reaction to the jump itself, Saru says "You never forget your first, sir."
• When Tilly is shadowing Pike as part of her command training, what does Pike suggest they do? "How about we marry some folks , even if they're not that into each other?"
• Ex-Terran Emperor Georgiou—a ruthless, xenophobic, cold-blooded killer—starts making goo-goo faces at Tyler and L'Rell's Klingon infant son.
• Georgiou suggests L'Rell find a wet-nurse, otherwise she won't have the time to get anything done. L'Rell takes it under advisement.
• The Reveal that when May talks about Discovery 's Captain, she's not referring to Lorca, as Tilly previously thought, but rather Stamets , because he's the one who interacts with the spores to make the ship jump from place to place.
• On that note, he evidently needs some sensitivity training. He manages to repeatedly insult May by referring to her as a fungus and by comparing her to bacteria. The already-frantic May is beside herself over the remarks. Not to mention her yelling at him as if he could hear her anyways.
• Stamets does not have a reassuring bedside manner. Stamets: This might hurt a bit. [It hurts a lot]
• Burnham cracks a joke about why she's so sure there's no teenage girl who'd never cried. Burnham: I know. I'm a xenoanthropologist.
• Amanda casually informs Burnham that, under the circumstances, she did the only logical thing: She stole Spock's classified medical records so Burnham could help her break into them. Burnham's only response is to stare off into the middle distance, processing what her adoptive mother just announced . You can just see her choking back "Mother, you and I have very different definitions of what 'the logical thing' means."
• Burnham is pleading with Pike to decrypt Spock's records. Pike jokingly asks Amanda if Burnham had always been this bossy. Amanda icily replies that, on Vulcan, it's referred to as being persistent . And that Burnham learned it from her. Cue an uncomfortable silence from Pike.
• Pike then tries to get information about Spock from a friend of his, only to learn that the case has been complicated by Spock's records being stolen. Cue nervous looks from both Burnham and Amanda.
• Linus expresses sympathy for Saru. Linus: I had a cold last week . It sucked. [ Beat as others look at Linus] Linus: [points at nose] Saurian. Six nasal canals?
• Also note: Captain Pike is speaking French .
• Bryce figures out what's going on and mimes "BOOM!".
• Saru arrives on the bridge, and Pike dryly welcomes him to the Tower of Babel . In Hebrew.
• Burnham explains to Saru, the resident Cunning Linguist , about the Universal Translator. His reply: Saru: I have eyes and ears , Burnham .
• And then finally, this bit after Saru gets everyone speaking Federation Standard again: Saru: Am I the only one who bothered to learn a foreign language?
• Her Volleying Insults with Stamets provide more "spore drive" humor when she grumbles about Discovery jumping through space on mushrooms like the ones she picks off her pizza.
• When Brunham realizes that the Sphere is trying to communicate: Reno: Well, damn, woman. Go!
• Tilly practically goes into convulsions and finally gives a Cathartic Scream when May earnestly asks for her help. You know, after having driven Tilly to a nervous breakdown and abducted her into another dimension.
• Pike starts to grin while watching Leland get dressed down, before he realizes that he's next in line, quickly dropping the grin as the Admiral gets on him for looking down his nose at Leland's clandestine mission.
• Pike presumes that, given that Discovery 's cooperation with Section 31 will be running a bit longer, that Tyler's assignment as liaison to Pike is now permanent. Leland: Unless you'd prefer Captain Georgiou ... Pike: No, thank you. Cornwell: Nope.
• Tilly and Airiam have been assigned to go through the massive database Discovery was given by the Sphere. Burnham asks to Tilly to look for any information there might be on Kaminar in the Sphere's archive. Tilly: That's what Airiam and I are here for. We will find it. Airiam: There it is. Tilly: When I said "we", I just meant Airiam.
• Georgiou has Burnham hit her to make Burnham's escape look good. Burnham does so... but doesn't wait for the cameras to reset. Gasping for air, Georgiou admits that it wasn't bad, but that Burnham should try again with some feeling .
• Later on, Georgiou gets her back by just barely missing Burnham with a phaser. Burnham's indignant look is met with a smile and a shrug before Georgiou resumes the act.
• After Burnham wakes up from seeing Spock's memories, Burnham asks what the Red Angel is, to which Spock replies that if he knew, they wouldn't be on Talos IV. The two begin bickering about the Rhetorical Question Blunder , and when Spock asks if Burnham has a question she's never asked, Burnham does pose one: "Do you actually think the beard is working?" Spock then pauses and rubs his hand over his face. Apparently, his Sanity Slippage was so much that he didn't even realize he had the beard.
• The Talosians, Burnham, and Spock troll Leland just before the illusionary Spock and Burnham disappear. Burnham: Say goodbye, Spock. Spock: [gives Vulcan salute to Leland] Goodbye, Spock. [Spock and Burnham vanish]
• Nhan is beginning to suspect that something is wrong with Airiam. During a discussion between the two of them, Airiam casually asks if the implants on Nhan's face allow her race to breath in an atmosphere designed for humans, which Nhan uncomfortably confirms. It's a very tense situation, but very prone to Black Comedy given that Nhan was introduced wearing a red uniform . During the episode's climax, Control!Airiam does indeed try to kill Nhan by ripping her implants off, but it is Airiam who dies at Nhan's hands in the end, after Nhan narrowly survives.
• During the fight between Control!Airiam and Burnham, Michael finds herself overwhelmed in the fight against her cyborg crewmate. At one point, Burnham resorts to attempting a drop-kick against her opponent, which mostly results in Burnham bouncing off of Airiam and falling gracelessly on her back.
• When Burnham asks why the Red Angel (possibly her future self) didin't simply tell them upfront about the coming galactic apocalypse, Spock suggests that it's her "penchant for dramatics". All Michael can do is give a very subdued but annoyed "Okay." Burnham: Let’s assume for a moment I am the Red Angel. If I knew about an apocalypse, why wouldn’t I say so? Spock: Perhaps you simply have a penchant for the dramatic. Burnham: Okay.
• Spock leaving both the audience and his fellow Starfleet officers (including an Admiral!) in stitches at what is clearly not simply Vulcan bluntness: it's a little brother tweaking his big sister's nose in front of all her friends...
• Spock also expresses regret that he wasn't there to see Leland get punched in the face. Spock: I believe I would have found the moment... satisfying .
• In response to a string of Techno Babble from Stamets, she gives him an intense look and remarks that he's smarter than Mirror Stamets was, but also more neurotic, before asking if he's considered medication. After an uncomfortable Beat , Stamets decides the only possible response is to throw out more Techno Babble as if nothing had happened.
• Culber walks in, dressed sharp and claiming to be looking for Cornwell. Tilly's response is interrupted by Georgiou, who chides her for attempting to defuse the "male tension" rather than relishing a little discomfort. Also, she seems to have nicknamed Tilly "Red."
• Also, Georgiou has joined the long list of characters who feel the need to stop Tilly from rambling. Even Georgiou's ability to enjoy public discomfort has limits, probably because she wanted to get back to trolling Stamets and Culber.
• When Georgiou encourages Stamets to continue with his Techno Babble , calling him " Paul ," he continues talking his way through the engineering problem at hand, while she stands very close to him and makes a show of Eating the Eye Candy . Finally, she compliments him, saying he is much savvier than Mirror Stamets was. Cue an incredulous Culber, still standing at the door : Culber: Uhm... you... you do know he's gay, right? Georgiou: Don't be so binary. In my universe, he was pansexual, and we had DEFCON-level fun together. You too , Papi . Culber: Did you just call me "Papi?"
• Stamets interjects, assuring Georgiou that in this and in any other universe, he's definitely gay. She freely agrees, pleased that everyone can see what is plainly obvious, before leaving the room in an uncomfortable silence. Tilly: What just happened?!
• How does Georgiou figure out that Leland has been compromised? Because he has abruptly stopped acting like a spineless idiot.
• Spock likes science.
• L'Rell meets with Tyler and Pike to discuss the Federation's need for time crystals from Boreth, a Klingon world. After the initial problem of convincing the Chancellor to allow Starfleet to get their hands on such potentially dangerous material, L'Rell moves on to arguing with Tyler about letting him go down to the planet for the crystals, which is actually an argument about putting their son at risk. As the argument escalates and switches into Klingon, Pike is left momentarily gobsmacked as he watches the two scream at each other before interrupting and announcing that he'll go instead.
• Burnham comes up with a plan for her to go after Leland by herself, to avoid putting Discovery at risk. Saru immediately approves the mission. Burnham, clearly having prepared for a lengthy argument to convince Saru of the mission's necessity, is left to respond with a Beat and a "Huh."
• Spock explains that he was ordered by Saru to accompany Burnham on her mission, and casually refutes her attempts to dissuade him. She's left to let out a frustrated snarl .
• Having noted the tension between Stamets and Culber, to the point that it's clearly distracting Stamets, Reno makes the decision to speak to Culber and prod him to talk to Stamets and clear the air... by barging into Sickbay, loudly declaring a medical emergency: She has a hangnail.
• With the franchise being perhaps THE standout example of making up technobabble in the name of allowing them to do effectively whatever the plot needs them to, there's something rather humorous in the key sci-fi creation of this episode that allows the crew to do what they need being referred to as "time crystals." Fridge Brilliance kicks in when you remember, these are something discovered on a Klingon world, by Klingons, who are DEFINITELY prone to being direct in their naming of things they discover.
• Tilly keeps letting slip details of Po's previous visit, to include stowing away in a cargo pallet. Further, Po mentions that Burnham is taller than she looks in her photos. Burnham stares off into the distance trying to figure out when Po could have seen a photo of her.
• In her universe , Georgiou was The Dreaded Terran Emperor who could have people killed at a whim. In this universe, she's a nobody that Po doesn't have to take sass from. Because Po is a Queen, and invoked a law to that effect. She punctuates her point by handing Georgiou her empty ice cream bowl as if Georgiou's job on the ship is to wash the dishes. The Terran is left speechless .
• Georgiou joins the growing list of Burnham's acquaintances who call her out for her habit of making every problem her exclusive problem to deal with. And warns her that Georgiou isn't the only person willing to exploit that. Burnham responds by acknowledging her "gaping character flaws" in the most sarcastic manner possible.
• Reno gives Burnham a time estimate. Burnham asks her if she can cut that estimate in half . Reno bluntly replies that no, she can't.
• Leland hails Discovery to demand they surrender the Sphere data to him. Georgiou informs him that they were just talking about him, and that everybody hates him . Georgiou: Congratulations.
• Multiple of the exchanges between Georgiou and Nhan, such as: Georgiou: Leland, you look well. Nhan: For a couple batteries and data core stuffed in a meat sack. Georgiou: Kind of like an AI sausage. Nhan: Ew. Control: Women! Stop talking!
• When Saru tells Reno to hurry up with the time crystal, she snaps back "Get off my ass." Then realizes she just said that to the CAPTAIN . So she tries to fix it by saying " Sir ! Get off my ass, sir !" as the turbolift closes, while Tilly gapes like a codfish .
• Doctor Pollard, Discovery ' s Chief Medical Officer, is on the communicator with Saru, stating that they're overwhelmed with casualties and asking if there's anyone, anyone at all, who can come to Sickbay and lend a hand. Saru replies that all personnel are already occupied, so the good doctor simply has to do her best. Pollard: [annoyedly flipping her communicator closed] No, I'm gonna do a half-assed job, because now's the perfect time.
• After the Klingons enter the battle, L'Rell's ship is hit and she grunts in pain as she is thrown backward. Tyler goes to check on her when she starts laughing. With a nice gash on her forehead, she states that she thought that her reign as Chancellor would be a "bloodless" one.
• Saru's sister Siranna is among The Cavalry , turning up in a Ba'ul starfighter. Saru has a bit of a hard time processing this last detail. Saru: You... have learned to pilot a fighter...
• Tilly tells Saru that she can re-energize the shields, but she has to close her eyes to do it as the last time she did work like that she was blindfolded for a bar bet. Then when she completes the repairs she states, "Someone owes me a beer."
• The first thing Po does after revealing to Pike that she's in the middle of the battle flying a shuttle is to claim diplomatic immunity for stealing it.
• During the denouement, all of the Starfleet characters are being interrogated, and they are instructed to give their name and rank. Number One , naturally replies: Number One: Number One . How long is this gonna take ?
• The officer debriefing Tyler notes that, after everything that's happened, Section 31 will likely be reorganized to operate more transparently from now on. Anyone who's seen Star Trek: Deep Space Nine knows that's not exactly how things turned out...
• Spock, at Number One's insistence, throws every question that he can think of at her, down to what matrix is used by the replicators. When he finally runs dry on relevant questions to ask, he asks her if she likes eggplant.
• The episode manages to pack an impressive degree of Ship Tease into a single Uncomfortable Elevator Moment . Number One orders Spock to give her a boost so she can reach an access panel. Spock is about to grab her by the waist before she stops him and orders him to get down on his knees instead so she can ride on his shoulders. It's all in the command tone that she uses.
• Number One showing her Hidden Depths by belting out the Modern Major General song . And Spock joins in .
• The trailer presents a classic sci-fi horror scenario: A ship's crew studying a strange new alien, only to find themselves frantically fighting off an outbreak as the rapidly reproducing creatures break out of containment. They're tribbles .
• In context, Larkin is suggesting the tribbles as a solution to a planet's food crisis. The only problem is, they don't breed very quickly, though they could fix that with some genetic enhancement .
• Larkin responds to questions about tribble intelligence by suggesting that he can make them all brain-damaged.
• Larkin eagerly waiting for one of the crew to unknowingly eat tribble meat, and then being confused at the horrified reaction .
• As the tribbles begin to overrun the ship, one crew member can be seen in the background with a giant backpack vacuum sucking up tribbles one-by-one.
• What really sells this is that the crux of the issue between Edward and Lucero (and thus the impetus for the tribbles getting out of control) is that each thinks that the other is bad at their job, or dumb. Edward complained to Lucero's superiors that she's a bad captain and "dumb" for moving him from protein studies to climatology, and then insists that she thinks he's dumb because of that reassignment and because she decides to transfer this malcontent off her ship. Before Edward's death, she insists that she doesn't think he's dumb (and indeed, she never said that) while trying to convince him to escape from the avalanche of tribbles about to crush him to death.
• The commercial itself is stylized after 90s-style commercials, complete with 4:3 aspect ratio and VHS tracking lines with distorted audio .

     Season 3 

• It's even better - apparently, the truth serum isn't supposed to work like this. Her Orion interrogator chews out his Andorian friend about it. Orion Interrogator Did you adjust the dosage again?! I've told you so many times not to do that!
• Upon spilling her guts and explaining what happened last season... Burnham: I saved ALL THE THINGS.
• Later, when asked what cargo Book was transporting: Burnham: I don't know, but it was temperature-sensitive and very valuable. So it was probably ice cream.
• Book's response to his cat being threatened? Book: She's a queen!
• During a pitched gunfight, Burnham apologizes to Book for breaking his nose earlier. Book asks her if she's only apologizing because she thinks she's about to die, and she makes no attempts to deny it.
• Book attempts to lose their pursuers via Teleport Spam , much to Burnham's growing frustration, especially as it doesn't work: every new transport results in them being suddenly surrounded by mooks a few moments later. He comes up with an idea Crazy Enough to Work . Book : OK, you're about to be really mad! Burnham : [Confused distressed sound before being tackled off of a cliff and transported into a spot some distance beneath the surface of a lake]
• Book's cargo, a large angry Trance Worm, quickly makes lunch out of the surviving pursuers, and then tries to eat Burnham. After some coaxing from Book, the worm spits Burnham out, sending her flying about thirty feet before she lands in a heap, Covered in Gunge . Book : Are you okay? Burnham : I really... really didn't know how this day was going to turn out.
• Even better, the regulation she quotes is about how Starfleet officers must comport themselves in a manner befitting Starfleet officers in all situations, "which is why we aren't freaking out being held at phaserpoint by strangers!" (while visibly freaking out, mind you). Then she meekly asks that they either lower their phasers or introduce themselves, "so that one of those things isn't true." Apparently, in Tilly's mind, being held at phaserpoint by an acquaintance is a preferable situation.
• And Nhan's eyeroll indicates that she agrees that she definitely should have seen that coming.
• One cut later, Stamets is spelling out "l-o-u-s-y t-s-h-i-r-t." Culber : "T-shirt" has a hyphen.
• Not to mention the fact that " And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt " jokes are still a thing in the 23rd century.
• It gets better - he ends up credited as "Ensign Hazmat"!
• And "Cleanup on aisle X" jokes are also still a thing in the future.
• It's Culber's forced cheerful tone that takes his arguments with Stamets from drama to comedy. He's furious and Stamets knows it.
• Zareh and Georgiou face off. Zare : A one-woman tactical response team. V'draysh has officially reached its nadir. Georgiou : A fancy vocabulary doesn't mean you're scary. It means you have a thesaurus.
• During this tense scene, Reno is sitting on a toolbox because she hurt her back at the beginning of the episode and unlike Stamets, knows her limits.
• Reno calls Stamets "bobcat" during another round of Snark-to-Snark Combat , and when questioned about it, simply says "I don't know, I'm on drugs." Stamets: Hugh, thanks. Jett, thanks for nothing. Reno: Back at you, Bobcat. Culber: "Bobcat"? Reno: I don't know, I'm on drugs.
• When Book asks where Burnham is, Georgiou asks if he means his girlfriend. Book : (too quickly) She's not my girlfriend . Georgiou : ( dubious look ) Book : No, really. She's not- we didn't have- Nope. Nope. We're not talking about this. Answer my question.
• Burnham returning to the ship with a very attractive male companion does not go unnoticed by Owosekun and Detmer , who share a silent look of acknowledgement , complete with a Fascinating Eyebrow from Detmer.
• Book's reaction to his first spore-jump. Book: Oh, shit ! (to Burnham) Hey, you didn't tell me about the spinning part!
• When all is said and done, Burnham states the uniform suits Book. Book states that the uniform gave him a rash.
• Georgiou also decides to wear a Starfleet uniform but has decided to promote herself to Admiral to "make it believable". Even more funny if one considers that Starfleet is the Trope Codifier for Insane Admiral — a role that fits her perfectly.
• It escalates further when Tilly, the resident genius kid, realizes that Adira is a Teen Genius , and begins to act as if her turf is being threatened. Tilly : Okay, we get it, you're smart, everybody here is smart!
• To cap it all off, the other inspector intercedes, reminding Adira that they're not there to start a fight. Evidently he was just as annoyed by Adira's interrogation as the crew was.
• Before this, some of the computer's less-than-ideal suggestions include yoga and reducing their dairy intake. And coloring books . Those are still a thing in the future.
• After foiling Vos's attempted ambush, Burnham holds him at gunpoint. Burnham: Where are the caves? Vos: Never. Burnham: Fine. [shoots him] Adira: Um, that... That wasn't Federation protocol. Burnham: No, it wasn't. They'll be fine.
• Culber's attempt at a Haiku during the crew's dinner. Emphasis on "attempt". Culber : Emperor Georgiou / Feasting on the finest cuts / Snarfs cookies on the down-low — I screwed up the last line.
• After dinner goes south, Georgiou says that at least the wine was good... and takes the whole bottle with her as she leaves.
• Earlier, Adira had told Burnham that they don't much go for inspirational speeches. Now, about to enter the pool of Mak'ala, they need inspiration. Adira: Tell me something inspirational. Just don't make it annoying. Burnham: Ah... get in there before someone shoots us? Adira: Okay.
• When the crew is gathered in the shuttle bay to watch a Buster Keaton movie, Linus offers Georgiou a tub of popcorn. After momentarily turning her nose up at the idea, she grabs the popcorn and starts gnoshing on it.
• Saru and Burnham are being debriefed by Admiral Vance, a medical hologram with No Sense of Personal Space paces around and leans in closely to examine them. At one point Burnham leans away while eyeing him warily. And then when noticing how active Burnham's limbic system is, asks her if she's prone to emotional exaggeration.
• When asked if he was clinically dead, Culber notes that he was also emotionally dead. Being murdered will do that to you. Culber : But my murderer and I are good now.
• While being debriefed, Reno is her usual Deadpan Snarker self. Interrogator: So, you were on an asteroid, and...? Reno: Commander Burnham fell out of the sky. With Captain Pike. It was raining Starfleet officers. Did you bring any snacks? I'm—I'm starving.
• Stamets is asked if he considers himself "essential personnel." Stamets Have you been talking to Detmer? Because I can't seem to get away from this question.
• We cut back to Reno, who has in fact been given a plate of chips and dip, and is now asking about beverage options.
• Tilly is shown talking about the time she had to get her hair restyled for her disguise as a Terran Captain-slash-Dominatrix. Then she sarcastically demands that they ask her if any of this was in the Handbook, seemingly to set up for a pun transition: Interrogator : Was any of this in the handbook? Tilly : No. Nhan : Nhan.
• Also, for some reason, Nhan has decided this is the time to develop a sense of humor, and is stubbornly refusing to give anything but her name, duty position, and serial number, with a puckish grin on her face because she evidently enjoys giving the holograms a hard time.
• Georgiou is asked what her relationship with Control was. Georgiou claims they dated.
• Lieutenant Willa goes on her first spore-jump. She tries to look nonchalant about it and fails.
• The first time this happens, he ends up in the captain's chair for a few seconds. Linus : Whoops, didn't expect to...this isn't the mess hall!... bye!
• And then it becomes a Moment Killer when he interrupts Burnham and Book about to kiss.
• Discovery is hailed... by Grudge. The crew is left to stare at the viewscreen, perplexed, before Tilly identifies the cat.
• As she puts together that Burnham has taken Book's ship, Grudge climbs over her back and then plants herself under Tilly's bed, ignoring Tilly's protests. Tilly: I don't like you.
• Burnham demonstrates the Tracking Device in Grudge's collar to Georgiou. Georgiou snarks that it should be impossible to lose a cat so large she has her own gravitational field.
• The mere fact that Georgiou, who's from both an alternate universe and over 200 years in our future, can make " the X whisperer " jokes.
• Georgiou submits Tolor to an unceasing torrent of verbal abuse, which she justifies on the basis of him being a bully. Not because she's offended by him being a bully, but because she's found bullies always crumble when faced with bigger bullies.
• The Romulans now live with the Vulcans.
• The Romulans are related to the Vulcans.
• Their homeworld (renamed Ni'Var) decided to leave the Federation.
• The Romulans wanted to stay in the Federation but got outvoted by the Vulcans.
• Much of this was directly the result of her little brother Spock's work. Book later jokes that her whole family is a bunch of overachievers.
• Burnham once again gets called out for her martyr complex in the middle of an important meeting. Burnham once again loses all sense of military bearing and reacts with a surprisingly-loud silent look of betrayal.
• Burnham talks with Book about how they do or don't fit in with Starfleet. Book points out that he is basically living in the Discovery's shuttlebay, and notes that none of the Starfleet personnel really know what to make of him.
• Tilly needs to talk to Stamets in private, so she drags him into the glass cube that he operates the Spore Drive from. Owo demonstrates why this isn't the best venue for a private meeting when she starts banging on the glass to ask Stamets a question.
• After the heartwarming way that the crew persuade Tilly to accept the post of Acting XO, they immediately bombard her with requests and grievances.
• During the Snark-to-Snark Combat between Culber and Georgiou, Culber warns Georgiou that her increasing brain dysfunction will lead to her forgetting things like "Where did I bury that last body?"
• Ryn and Lt. Detmer take Book's small ship up against the monstrous Orion Heavy Cruiser Viridian , and only have a chance because Detmer is an excellent pilot and Ryn knows the larger ship's weak points. During the fast, brutal fight, Grudge jumps onto Ryn's lap, and Ryn — who is already on edge and has never seen a cat before — has a small panic attack.
• "Manifest" gets dropped immediately.
• Tilly suggests trying out Pike's "Hit it" , telling Saru to put his own spin on it, only to immediately cringe when he tries it.
• He tries out "Execute" on the bridge, only for everyone to stare with looks of "That's really what you're going with?" (Even the background music quits on him .)
• Finally, he tries "Carry on." This earns a non-commital shrug.
• Georgiou changes into a white bodysuit for the medical scan. She quips that it makes her look like a giant sperm, albeit with more formal language.
• The newspaper, it should be noted, is chock-full of references to other Star Trek stories going back to the original series.
• Carl (the afore-mentioned chubby little man with a cigar and a bowler hat) fancies himself a bit of a Pungeon Master , bombarding Georgiou and Burnham with door puns until Georgiou finally agrees to walk through the door that has appeared next to him. "What do you call a cute portal? A- door -able. A clown held a door open for me. It was a nice jester ."
• Mirror Tilly asking Georgiou with a saccharine smile, "Emperor, if I may, why is Michael Burnham still using up oxygen on my ship?" Followed up shortly afterward by her batting her eyelids and looking flattered when Georgiou tells her 'you are the most feared interrogator in the quadrant'.
• When Mirror Burnham is finally released, she's disappointed to learn that the Emperor has removed Kelpien from the menu, because Burnham was craving ganglia in her cell. The Emperor's reasoning for doing so? Kelpiens are too high in cholesterol, and Burnham accepts this as valid. Despotic, xenophobic regime that encourages Klingon Promotion ... but at least they're health-conscious.
• After Carl reveals himself as the Guardian of Forever, he lampshades his rather lax standards back in TOS. Carl: It used to be "Sure, come on through. Just don't screw up history or you'll have to fix it."
• Burnham and Culber mysteriously being transformed into different species upon beaming down to the shipwreck? Mysterious and unsettling. Saru being transformed into a human? Somehow hilarious, especially given Doug Jones having made his name playing various non-human roles in heavy makeup and costume and now is just... Doug Jones looking mildly freaked out.
• Tilly and Osyraa have a tense back-and-forth, but while Osyraa is being cold and threatening, Tilly is being sassy and using heavily weaponized " No, You " ripostes. Osyraa : Found you. Tilly : We found each other .
• Burnham finds Su'Kal, and he asks if she is one of the Holos. Burnham rolls with it to keep the converesation going, and takes on a faux-cheerful obliging attitude that any retail worker would recognize on-sight.
• Saru introduces himself and his friends with, "I am Saru. This is Michael and Hugh."
• As they prepare to ram into Discovery's shuttlebay, Book goes through a checklist, ending with making sure Grudge is secure. A hologram then pops up of Grudge in a cat bed.
• The bridge crew is being held in the ready room under armed guard, banned from speaking to each other. Rhys and Bryce begin tapping out messages with their fingers, which quickly gets noticed and called out by the Regulators. When they start tapping again, Owo yells at them to stop being childish before they get someone killed, which leads to an escalating argument which distracts the Regulators enough for the crew to take them by surprise and overpower them. Booker asks what message they were tapping out, and Rhys says it was Morse Code for "Keep Tapping."
• Osyraa is snacking off of a plate of fruit, talking about how the replicated stuff doesn't taste as good as the naturally grown fruit the Emerald Chain produces. Vance decides this is the perfect time to mention that the replicated food is made from the crew's shit , broken down to the atomic level and recombined as food. Osyraa visibly spits out the portion she was chewing on, as Vance takes a hearty bite from another piece of fruit.
• Burnham and Book try to open diplomatic relations with the "butterfly people", as Book calls them. Things progressively get worse, culminating in them detecting Grudge aboard Book's ship. In trying to explain her presence, both reflexively refer to Grudge as a "queen", which makes the butterfly people hostile because they assume she's a captured monarch note  as in monarch butterfly . After a protracted chase, Burnham and Book beam back into his ship, and Book makes a point of very deliberately petting Grudge in front of them. Michael : Why do you even have a pet? Why can't you just have a holographic goldfish. Book : Had one. Grudge ate it. Michael : Who eats a hologram?!
• The way that their emperor mocks Burnham's offer of dilithium "for the low, low price of 'no strings attached'" makes it sound like he's already seen the Federation's infomercial and was not impressed.
• The entire opening sequence plays like a Mythology Gag poking fun at the Kelvin Universe films, with a diplomatic mission going wrong due to the suspicious other party misunderstanding the Starfleet captain's attempts to put them at ease, as well as a chase through the woods where they have to jump off of a cliff. Which isn't, as Burnham notes, even the first cliff she's been chased over.
• Dark comedy, but one of Commander Nalas’ human crew calls their situation “a shit show”, which he’s told is “Earth language for bad”.
• A minor note: Stamets had planned to take a job at the Vulcan Science Academy . Two seasons and nine hundred years later, he finally visits the Ni'Var Science Institute, and is rather nonplussed with how they work there.
• After the mission is over, Vance gives Burnham a rather long-winded analogy in which he compares people in The Federation to an orchestra that the president conducts, with everyone playing their own essential parts. When Burnham points out how verbose it was, he says, "Well, they pay me by the letter."
• The premise of "Tilly works with the Qowat Milat," given how uniquely suited they are for dealing with her tendency to overshare.
• Tilly nervously rambles about the mission to a Qowat Milat nun, peppering a few Verbal Backspaces when she realizes her excitement might land poorly when they are hunting one of their fellow Qowat Milat sisters. Once the awkward pause takes hold, the nun casually replies:
• Book is still grieving, but he can at least joke with his girlfriend treating his ship like a car.
• Mixed with Heartwarming: Michael and Tilly reminiscing about their first days as roommates. Tilly terrified of being knifed in her sleep by the notorious mutineer, and Michael having to dampen out Tilly's loud snoring.
• Near the end of the episode, Michael enters her Ready Room and calls out for Zora to tell her where to find someone when she spots Grudge and says her name. Zora tells Michael where Grudge is , leading her to mutter under her breath "Yes, I can see that."
• Haz's nicknames for Book and Burnham are "Glowworm" and "Right Hook." Also, he's a Shipper on Deck .
• Owo decides to enter a no-holds-barred prize fight to secure some necessary funds for their mission. Captain Burnham takes on the role of hype woman to get folks to bet on her, calling her "Oh Wow" Owosekun, which gets her a funny look from Owosekun.
• The amazingly unenthusiastic casino girl who brings Burnham and Owosekun their winnings could give April Ludgate a run for her money.
• Book and Tarka are trying to spot a cheater in the casino, and figure out that it's a Changeling. When cornered, the Changeling shapeshifts... into a tribble, and takes off rolling across the casino floor.
• Book and Burnham find themselves in a high-stakes poker game for the Mineral MacGuffin against two Emerald Chain goons and decide to team up against them. Burnham's strategy seems to be to act as distracting as possible and to tell what are strongly implied to be embarrassing stories about Book.
• Haz Mazaro does not have any time for Hold Your Hippogriffs : Haz: You got yourself a deal. But you jab a brussel fly, and I'll scoot some greenbread. Clear? Book: ... Crystal?
• After Saru gets the delegates settled aboard Discovery , he describes the process to Burnham with an Earth analogy about "herding cats". Despite the gravity of the situation, Burnham can't help but laugh a bit.
• When they meet again later, Detmer thanks Adira for the advice, noting that she did, in fact, "fly good" during the mission.
• Saru shows Michael his idea of stress relief and cuts loose with an incredibly loud Cathartic Scream . The dainty little cough as he composes himself afterwards just makes it even funnier. Saru: Sorry. Michael: Don't be. It's not even close to the weirdest thing that's happened to me today.
• When Burnham and Book talk for the first time in awhile, a Funny Background Event has a tribble crawling around a hallway frame before it falls off and drops to the ground, scurrying off in a panic.
• Well, a rambling -er Tilly...
• Jinaal-in-Culber's offhand comment of "Wow, this guy really works out!"
• Book's first attempt at using his empathy on the Trill wildlife is blocked and results in him saying he senses hostility from the creatures that are currently trying to kill them. Michael snarks that she could also tell that.
• Tilly's twenty words : Tilly: You're. On. A. New. Ship. Fresh. Off. A. Demotion. Trying. To. Hide. How. Hard. That. Is. By. Being. A. Giant—
• It also isn't clear if he was using a Kellerun expression to begin with, or just mangled one of the human ones he learned.
• Archivist Hy'Rell can't help but welcome Cleveland Booker with a joke. Hy'Rell: Is your name really Book? Booker: Uh, yeah. Hy'Rell: How fun to have a Book visit me in the library for a change!
• Raynor looks up everything Dr Derex accessed while at the Library in the hopes of finding a clue. Unfortunately she was not picky in her reading and was interested in everything up to and including Talaxian Hairstyles .
• Burnham later bluffs her way out of another confrontation with Breen crew by yelling at Book for not having his security access updated.
• The Breen are evidently very open to socializing with Breen they don't know personally. Burnham gets invited to what turns out to be the Breen equivalent of a Christmas party, and Book distracts another by flirting with them until he is invited to share an oil bath with the Breen and their partner later.
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Here's a Joke

45 Funny Star Trek Jokes

Here are 45 funny Star Trek jokes and the best Star Trek puns to crack you up. These jokes about Star Trek are great jokes for kids and adults.

Star Trek puns

Here is our top list of Star Trek dad jokes. Find your favorite puns about Star Trek, have a laugh, then share and enjoy this Star Trek humor with others.

• Did you hear about the Captain of the Enterprise? He had a one trek mind.
• What do you call two science officers having an argument? Science Friction.
• Did you hear about the Federation weapons expert? He never forgets a phaser.
• What is Commander Riker’s favorite hobby? Sewing, because Captain Picard is always saying “Make it so.”
• Why did Riker die from friendly fire ? Because Picard ordered “Fire at Will.”
• What are glasses called on planet Vulcan? Spocktacles.
• Did you hear Kirk reciting verse at Warp Speed? It was poetry in motion.
• Why did the Romulan cross the road? To conquer the other side.
• How do you get a one-armed Klingon out of a tree ? Wave to him.
• What did the first officer say when Captain Picard asked him why he let Troi win at cards ? Because I Riker.

• Where do the Borg go to eat fast food? Borger King.
• Why does this Star Trek uniform stink? William Shatner.
• How does a Romulan frog stay camouflaged? He uses a croaking device.
• Why did Worf change his hair color? It was a good day to dye.
• What did Scotty say when little shards of ice began hitting the Enterprise? “Captain, we are being hailed.”
• What space illness makes you red and itchy? Chicken Spocks.
• What was the potato’s favorite sci-fi show?  Starch Trek.
• Where does a ten-foot Mugato sleep ? Anywhere he wants to.
• Why did the chicken cross the road? To boldly go where no chicken had gone before.
• Did you hear about the Klingon plan to wrap the Enterprise in silver paper ? Luckily, the plan was foiled.
• Why did Spock cross the road? Because it was logical.
• What’s a shark’s favorite science fiction TV show?   Shark Trek.
• Why was Captain Picard so confused when the android disappeared? Because they’d lost their Data .
• Why did the Enterprise have to go to the garage for repair? It needed new Spock plugs.
• What’s it called when a crew member on Deep Space 9 runs as fast as he can? Worf Speed.

Star Trek one liners

Here are some great Star Trek joke one liners that you can quip whenever someone is talking about Star Trek.

• We have engaged the Borg. The wedding will be Friday.
• I used to confuse Star Wars with Star Trek. It was a Wookie mistake.
• When Star Trek fans go to a convention, they get a gift. It’s called the enter prize.
• Lessons learned from Star Trek: Nemesis. Always remember to backup your Data.
• It seems the Klingons had a diabolical plan to trap the Enterprise in silver paper. Luckily, the plan was foiled.
• Real Trekkers work out at the He’s Dead Gym .
• Reality is for people who can’t handle Star Trek.
• If I have a son I will name him Data, after Mr.Data from Star Trek. If it’s a girl, we’ll pronounce it Data.
• No one in the Star Trek universe knows how to tie a neck tie. They’re all used to Klingons.
• I tried to sneak into a Star Trek convention disguised as a Doctor . The security guard suspected I was not the Real McCoy.

Best Star Trek jokes

These next funny Star Trek puns are some of our best jokes and puns about Star Trek!

• What’s a Star Trek fan’s favorite drink ? Picardi and Kirk.
• If Spock has pointy ears, what does Scotty have? Engineers.
• What was the tree’s favorite thing about Star Trek?  The Captain’s log.
• What does every Star Trek fan ask for from a mobile network? Unlimited Data.
• Have you heard about the new Star Trek Christmas movie? It’s The Wreath of Khan.
• Why was Star Trek so successful? It had good Genes.
• What did Star Trek teach millions of kids? To boldly split infinitives.
• What do you call a buff Trekkie at the gym?  A flextra terrestrial.
• What do you use to decide whether to host a Star Trek poetry event? A list of prose in Khans.
• How many ears does Captain Kirk have? Three. A right ear , a left ear and a final front-ear.

Final thoughts

After reading through all these hilarious jokes about Star Trek, we hope you had a good laugh.

If you want to hear more funny puns, then check out these other great lists of funny jokes :

• Goodbye jokes
• Jokes about walls
• Tire jokes for kids

Hi!  I'm Che , and I hope you enjoy these jokes as much as me. These jokes lists are curated by me alone. I handpick the jokes for quality, create some myself or add ones that have been contributed by readers like you.

I constantly update  Here's A Joke  posts to ensure top quality. Not feeling a joke or got one to share? Let me know in the comments or  contact me . With your support, I'm aiming for the best joke site around.

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Star Trek Jokes

Star trek characters make the worst sports fans..., what do all star trek captains have in common.

This joke may contain profanity. 🤔

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common?

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Published Apr 1, 2020

The 8 Best Practical Jokes In Trek History, Ranked

Today is a good day... to prank.

StarTrek.com

The switch from a terrestrial calendar to the stardates system means that, for most of the various crewmen living and working in the Federation, there’s no such thing as April. Therefore, there’s no such thing as April 1st, and further no such thing as April Fool’s Day. But although there’s no longer a specific day devoted to playing practical jokes on your fellow humanoids, the prankster spirit of the holiday lives on.

Somewhat surprisingly for a post-scarcity utopia largely devoid of interpersonal conflict, characters throughout the Star Trek franchise delight in pranking one another, with examples peppered throughout the various shows and movies. It turns out that pranks are about a lot more than simply having fun at the expense of other people, and through the way they’ve been used on Trek , we can learn a lot about the purpose pranking serves here on Earth.

Here are the eight most important pranks in the history of Star Trek :

8) Dax Moves Odo’s Stuff (A Few Centimeters)

As a changeling, Odo is acutely aware of the size, shape, and — most importantly — the positioning of all the objects around him. Which is why he found it so irritating when, on four separate occasions, Jadzia Dax broke into Odo’s quarters while he regenerated in his gelatinous state to move everything the slightest amount. Nobody but Odo ever would have noticed such a change, which shows what a brilliant prankster Dax is. Some of the best pranks should be artisanal, carefully crafted for the person on the receiving end. Jokes like tying someone’s shoelaces together are as simple as they are uncreative, and a truly tailor-made prank should tell the person being pranked ‘hey - I know you, I understand you, which I can prove by irritating the crap out of you.’

In Dax’s mischievous sort of way, she was showing Odo that she cared enough about him to learn all of his little idiosyncrasies, and really understood him as a person. Since, at the time, Starfleet was growing increasingly paranoid about the threat the Founders posed, Dax taking the time to annoy Odo the same way she would any of her other friends is, secretly, kind of sweet.

7) Doctor Zimmerman Pranks The Doctor

When The Doctor transmitted his program to the Alpha Quadrant to save his creator, Dr. Lewis Zimmerman, Zimmerman didn’t want The Doctor’s help. After all, the EMH Mark 1 was a notorious failure, renowned throughout Starfleet for its brusque, prickly manner as a physician. Eventually, Voyager ’s holographic physician wore Zimmerman down though, and the first crack in the facade came when Zimmerman rigged The Doctor’s medical tricorder so that it believed everything scanned to be a Vulcan marsupial. Ultimately, the best pranks serve as acts of friendship —- either deepening an existing one or, in this case, beginning a new one.

6) Kirk Reveals He Was Bullied

Not all pranks are meant in good spirits, however. In The Original Series episode “Shore Leave,” the eponymous planet begins summoning a copy of Finnegan, an upperclassman who tormented Kirk throughout his Academy days. A window into a time in Kirk’s life when he wasn’t the coolest cat on campus, it also showcases the lingering harm you can cause someone when you prank people with bad intentions.

5) Jake Potts Pranks His Brother

In “Brothers,” a homing signal activated by Doctor Soong triggers a hidden program in Commander Data, forcing everyone’s favorite android to take over the Enterprise with truly terrifying rapidity. It would have been very much a no-harm-no-foul kind of situation, except that up in Sickbay, little Willie Potts was dying of parasites. Jake Potts, his older brother, had tricked Willie into thinking he’d accidentally killed him, and in his shame and terror Willie ran and hid, eating local fruits that caused his medical predicament. Data’s hijacking waylaid the Enterprise while they were en route to get Willie lifesaving medicine. Willie ended up all right in the end, but it showcased one outcome of the all-too-common occurrence of taking a joke too far.

4) Harry Kim Kisses A Cow

Tom Paris and Harry Kim grew to be closer to brothers than friends over their time in the Delta Quadrant, and one of the hallmarks of their relationship was jokes, ribbing, and pranks. Once, while Harry was enjoying a holo-date on the Fair Haven holoprogram, Tom replaced Harry’s female companion for the evening with a dairy cow right as Harry closed his eyes and went in for a kiss. As is often the case on Trek , this simple moment snowballed into an ever-expanding avalanche of unintended consequences, as the glitching holograms of the simulation began seeing through the perceptual filters and believed themselves to be beset by “spirit folk.”

3) Jake And Nog Unleash the Garanian Bolites

The sheer number of things that result from this simple moment are hard to overstate. In “A Man Alone,” only the fourth episode of Deep Space Nine , Jake Sisko decides to befriend Nog, one of the only other children aboard the entire station. Nog quickly gets Jake in trouble with the law by releasing some Garanian bolites onto an unsuspecting couple walking the Promenade, who rightly freak out when their skin first starts itching, and then changing all the colors of the rainbow.

This moment catches the attention of Keiko O’Brien, who decides to open a school aboard the station to help curtail the criminal idleness of the younger generation. Her teaching methods —- including her decision to stick to secular practices when discussing the wormhole rather than hewing to traditional Bajoran religious beliefs —- led to an anti-Starfleet uprising aboard the station that culminated in the classroom getting bombed by extremists, and also started the political career of Vedek (later Kai) Winn.

This prank also serves as a bonding experience for Jake and Nog, one of the most important friendships of the entire franchise. Without this prank, Jake would never have helped teach Nog to read, and Nog would likely have never become Starfleet’s first Ferengi officer. Furthermore, seeing Nog strike out on his own helped inspire his father to stand up to his brother Quark more, eventually leading to Rom becoming a labor leader, and subsequently quitting the bar to become part of the station’s maintenance crew. In that new role, Rom was able to devise self-replicating spatial mines that held the Dominion on the other side of the wormhole for months. Essentially, Garanian bolites saved the Alpha Quadrant.

2) Nog Spills A Bucket Of “Odo” On Jake

Pranks remained a part of Jake and Nog’s friendship as it grew, like in this joke where Nog, while supposedly helping Jake steal Odo’s bucket, pretends to trip and spills the contents of the bucket all over Jake. Jake, thinking he’s just been doused with a bucket of Odo, starts freaking out, before Nog reveals that he filled the bucket with oatmeal from the replicator. This prank is nowhere near as important as Jake and Nog’s prank with the Garanian bolites, but it makes the list for two reasons. One, it’s a really funny prank, and two, it’s always good to remember the simple delight of seeing Aron Eisenberg laugh with all the energy he brought to the role of Nog.

1) Doctor Crusher Takes An (Involuntary) Swim

When Worf got knocked into the icy waters of the (holographic) Atlantic during a gathering to celebrate his promotion, the Enterprise ’s senior staff was wracked with laughter. When Data expressed his confusion as to why someone falling into a freezing ocean would be funny, Dr. Crusher explains that you simply need to get caught up in the moment and do something spontaneous. Data responds by shoving Beverly into the water, which nobody thinks is funny. This moment was the straw that broke the camel’s back for Data, who had long struggled to master human concepts like humor. As this list has showcased throughout, pranks and jokes are a key component to building and deepening friendships, and Data had forever found himself on the outside looking in at such interactions. Data decided to finally install the emotion chip that Doctor Soong had intended for him years earlier, which affected every decision he made throughout First Contact , Insurrection , and Nemesis .

Armed with this list and the lessons it contains, you can start planning pranks of your own - though without access to a holodeck, Garanian bolites, or an easy way to replicate three gallons of oatmeal, you’re going to have to work a little harder to pull them off. Just remember that the best pranks are done among friends, in the spirit of friendship.

The 8 Best Practical Jokes in Star Trek History

Sean Kelly (he/him) is a freelance writer based in St. Louis. He occasionally gets depressed that he’ll never know what raktajino tastes like.

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The Big Picture

• The Blu-ray and DVD collections for Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 are now available with over 2 hours of bonus content.
• Doug Jones, who played Saru, shares his hopes for Discovery 's legacy and reveals some special moments from filming the series.
• Saru's final arc in Season 5 includes a heartwarming love story that brings his character to a happily-ever-after ending.

Star Trek: Discovery may have come to an end with its fifth and final season earlier this year, but the adventure continues as the Blu-ray and DVD collections for Season 5 hit shelves today. With over two hours of bonus content, the journey doesn't have to end and the new gag reel and audio commentaries just might make the wait for Starfleet Academy a little bit easier. To celebrate the home release of Discovery Season 5 I sat down with Doug Jones , known for his many creature roles in a vast range of movies and television series.

Jones, who played Saru, the Kelpian first officer turned diplomat throughout Discovery 's five seasons , shared his hopes for the legacy of the series within the eternal Star Trek franchise as well as his reasons for why you absolutely need to bring the Blu-ray or DVD version of Season 5 home. He also shared a heartwarming story about his first and last moments in the series and the romantic happily ever after for Saru in the show's series finale. You can read the transcript of our conversation below or watch it in the player above.

Star Trek: Discovery

Taking place almost a decade before Captain Kirk's Enterprise, the USS Discovery charts a course to uncover new worlds and life forms.

COLLIDER: Saru goes on such a beautiful journey across the five seasons of this show and with this crew. With the series wrapped now and coming to this lovely home release, what do you hope the legacy of Discovery will be in five years, 10 years, within this hopefully eternal franchise?

DOUG JONES: I think with 58 years under our belt, it's on its way to being an eternal franchise. [Laughs] With Discovery 's place in the Star Trek universe, I hope the takeaway fans take from our show is hope. The word hope seems to be what drove us all, from the writers to us actors, and the film crew — offering hope for a future that makes sense, a hope for a future where conflict can be resolved with peaceful, diplomatic discussion as opposed to war. I'm hoping that our takeaway will be a future that is peaceful and makes sense to all of us. And that seems to be what the fans’ feedback has given me.

When I'm out there on the convention circuit meeting people one at a time, I keep hearing about, “Oh my gosh, this show has meant so much to me.” And the thing about art is that people take different things away from a piece of art. There can be a sculpture on a stand, and four different people looking at it can take away four different things from that piece of art. So, our show has been controversial because some people have taken away different things from it, but the ones who get a story and find themselves on film find a story they can relate to. In the entire Star Trek Universe, the whole franchise, there is a character for everyone and there's a storyline for everyone if you wanna find yourself and find something you can relate to in that show. So, Discovery has tapped a whole demographic.

Absolutely. One of my favorite things about collecting physical media is the bonus features. With this home release, can we expect to see you on some of the bonus features? Did you pop in for any commentaries or the gag reel?

JONES: There will be, indeed, an audio commentary that I'm not a part of, but there are so many features that are only on the DVD and Blu-ray collection, including some character backstories and character development behind the scenes, especially for Michael Burnham's character. Also, interviews from all of us that will only be on the DVD release. My favorite part of the bonus features that will only be on the DVD and Blu-ray is the gag reel. I love me some gag reel every year, and I make my way into it every time. [Laughs] I've already seen the gag reel for Season 5 and I'm in there, and I did hit the approval button on that one, like, “Yes, love it!”

Doug Jones Felt the "Responsibility and Gravity" of Joining Star Trek

"it made sense that i would have been in star trek at some point during my career.".

Amazing. I can't wait to see it. Looking back at the show, can you tell me about the first and last moments when you really felt the magic of the series?

JONES: The first moment of, “Oh my gosh,” was, “I am part of the Star Trek franchise now.” As an actor who's worn lots of rubber bits over the years, it made sense that I would have been in Star Trek at some point during my career — didn't happen until I was 56 years old. I thought that ship had sailed, but turns out that ship was a starship, and it finally docked and said, “Get on.” [Laughs] So, my first day on the set of Season 1, Episode 1 was like, “Oh, we're really here. I'm on the bridge of a freaking starship in Starfleet in the Federation. Oh my gosh! And I'm playing a species that's never been seen in this franchise ever before.” What a responsibility and gravity that I felt for that, as well.

At the end of the series, it was like, “Wow, have I been on a journey with this character and with this team of people.” It was a very emotional day, our final day, hugging each other and everyone fighting back tears and having a very happily-ever-after for my character. Saru went through such a journey, professionally. Upward mobility. Every promotion he got was like one more step up for a Kelpien for the first time, one more step up for a character who lived in fear and now is living in confidence and courage, getting over anxiety, and then finding love for the first time in his life, ending the series in a marriage. They get to live happily ever after romantically , and he gets to live happily ever after professionally. It couldn't have been better. I could not ever have imagined a better finality for this character.

I know that Season 5 wasn't originally planned to be the end, but with it coming to this really beautiful full-circle moment. Can you talk a bit about Saru’s final arc being that love story?

JONES: Again, it was kind of like this really, really good luck that Saru’s love story came to that sort of happily-ever-after in Season 5, not knowing that that was gonna be… We thought we had seven seasons to go, or a couple more. So, when I got the news that Season 5 was our final one, I thought back to what we filmed in Season 5 and I thought, “That feels pretty right to me.” That's a great jump-off point for Saru, I think. I was sad to leave all my friends and this family that we built, but at the same time, story-wise, I felt pretty satisfied.

Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 is now available on Blu-ray and DVD. You can stream the entire series on Paramount+.

Watch on Paramount+

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Interview: Wilson Cruz On Why ‘Star Trek: Discovery’ Season 5 Was The Most Fun; Imagines ‘Academy’ Role

| August 25, 2024 | By: Laurie Ulster 8 comments so far

On Tuesday, the fifth and final season of Star Trek: Discovery arrives on Blu-ray and DVD complete with audio commentarp, deleted scenes, exclusive special features, a gag reel, and more. ( Full details and pre-order links available here .) Before Disco comes home one last time, Wilson Cruz talked to TrekMovie about the biggest challenges of his five-year run as Dr. Hugh Culber, the most fun, the breakthrough moments, opportunities he’d still hoped to have, and his thoughts on what Hugh could bring to Starfleet Academy .

Looking back on all five seasons of Star Trek: Discovery , what arc of Culber’s was the most challenging for you to play?

I’m going to be honest with you: This past season was pretty challenging, but if I was going to pick the most challenging season, the one that I had to get right in order for the rest of it to work was season 2, where we see Culber come back to life, and not necessarily come back and just jump right into the old life. He had to deal with the real ramifications of what happened, sharing the ship with the person who killed him, but also taking stock of his life and trying to understand which parts of it worked for him in the past and which parts he was no longer willing to accept, or at least was willing to question. He questioned his marriage, he questioned whether he wanted to be a doctor anymore. He dealt with Ash Tyler even in a physical way, so making all of that resonate, and real, and set him up for the person he was going to become in season 3, this person who was unshackled from his past and allowed him to step into who he wants to be? That’s that was really satisfying.

Culber confronts Ash Tyler in season 2

So in contrast, what was the most fun?

I think the most fun season was this past season, season 5.  Because he’s still asking big questions. He’s still dealing with some anxiety, with the unknown, with uncertainty, but he’s dealing with it face on, head on. And I was afforded all of these opportunities as an actor to stretch, to have fun, to go big, right? Playing Jinaal was a real challenge, and it was fun, but creating him for two weeks before those cameras rolled was one of the biggest acting challenges of my life, because they literally were like “You can make him whoever you want,” which was like, don’t say THAT to me, right? Like,…  parameters. So I was trying on a bunch of different people, and it was, you know, hit or miss. I landed on this version of it that I didn’t even show the other actors until the cameras rolled and they got to see him, because the very first scene we shot was the zhian’tara, where he gets taken over by Jinaal. So when Jinaal comes out, that was the first time that they saw him, so all of those reactions you’re seeing in that moment are very real.

Jinaal takes Book and Michael on an unpredictable excursion to find the next clue left by the Progenitors in season 5

You did a beautiful job. I mean, we’ve talked about this , but it was incredible. You really embodied this new person.

Also, the scenes with Book was really, were really fun to play, right? That creating that relationship, building that relationship, so and getting to do a scene in Spanish with my grandmother, and honoring our grandmothers. You know, doing a scene in Spanish–I had never in my life, in my career, been allowed to do a scene in my native language. So that was really exciting and satisfying to do. Look, I have chills. [holds up his arm]

Culber speaks Spanish to a hologram of his grandmother

And if there’d been another season, what would you like to have seen Culber do? He’s already been through so much, but what else would you like to explore with him?

The thing is, is that I felt, even before we knew it was the end of the series, I felt like season 5 was the end of this chapter for him. You know, because at the end, when we see him in that last scene, he has embraced this uncertainty. He has embraced the wonder and awesomeness of things that he can’t explain in his life, but that have been amazing… have been literally awesome, like in the real definition of the word. And we see him just kind of smile and accept it and be okay with being in awe of it, as opposed to just needing answers for everything like the scientist that he is. I was excited to see who he was going to become now that he had really stepped into his own, into the fact that he wasn’t just a doctor, that he was also the counselor, that he had created all of these relationships with characters outside of Paul. So I really wanted to see him go harder into his counselor role, like I wanted to see him on away missions, and how his being a counselor really helped him bring that kind of understanding to away missions. Because he’s the most empathetic character on the show, he has insight that others don’t, and I wanted to see him bring that more to away missions, and I think we would have probably seen him on more away missions. And I wanted to see him more physical. I wanted to see him… You know, we got to see him fight a couple of times, and it was, I would say, pretty impressive. And I wanted to see more of that side of him too, that he’s no pushover.

Culber goes on an away mission to the 10C planet in season 4

So if you get the call to guest star on Starfleet Academy , what would you like to see Culber doing there? Have you thought about that?

Yeah! I think he’s kind of the perfect person to guide the cadets who want to be counselors, to help them lean into their strengths in terms of their own empathy, their willingness, their ability to listen, when it’s appropriate to challenge when it’s not. [laughs] I would love to see him play that kind of role that allows young people who are taking on new challenges to listen to their instincts, which is a hard thing to do when you’re young, because you don’t actually think you know anything. You have this bravura that says that you do, but inside you have the insecurity of like, “Can I do this? Do I know how to do this? Will I succeed?” I’d love to see him do that.

That doesn’t go away for some people anyway.

Yeah. But also, like, leaning into it, right? Like, as a counselor, you know the fact that you understand that that never goes away, how you allow that to guide you, and have that be a strength and not a weakness.

Well, I hope you get to do it, because that would be lovely to see

We’ll see! [crosses fingers]

Culber gives advice to young Adira (with a worried Stamets) before an away mission in season 5

Star Trek: Discovery season 5 comes home August 27

You can pre-order  Discovery  Season 5  at Amazon on Blu-ray for $34.99  or  DVD for $29.99 . The limited edition Steelbook Blu-ray can be  pre-ordered for $39.99 .

Season 5 Steelbook Blu-Ray

The complete series box set can be pre-ordered for  $59.95 on Blu-ray and  $49.95 on DVD .

Box art for complete series Blu-ray edition

DISCLAIMER: When we link to products to buy on Amazon in our articles, these are customized affiliate links that support TrekMovie by earning a small commission when you purchase through them.

Note: The interview has  been edited for brevity and clarity.  

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Interview: Doug Jones On His Surprise ‘Star Trek: Discovery’ Evolution And Ideas For Saru On ‘Academy’

Even though DISCOVERY was not overly good, Wilson Cruz was always excellent. He was one of the show’s best assets.

Culber was one of the only characters that they got right from the start.

The only characters I loved from their introduction until the end (not counting the TOS/SNW crew) were Culber, Reno, Lorca, Mudd, L’Rell, Kovich, and Voq-Tyler. I really liked Saru and Stamets before the time jump, but after the jump the writers lost their story and they faded into the background. And while Book and Vance were great in season three, after that they became superfluous.

I couldn’t really connect to any of the other characters. Burnham was beyond annoying, Gray was horribly acted, and Georgiou was boring. Tilly was fun in principle, and there were episodes in which I enjoyed her, but the writers couldn’t seem to decide how to write for her–her character was all over the place. As for Adira, the bridge crew, and Nhan, none of them ever really had a chance to shine. Disco had so much potential, but for me (and others’ mileage will of course vary) it almost never lived up to it. The 23rd-century seasons are the only ones I’ll likely rewatch.

He’s a good actor, given almost nothing to work with. Not sure what was “challenging” for him about season 5, apart from having to put on a voice for one episode.

Yeah, that was kind of weird. He really didn’t have any challenging work in season 5.

The sooner you stop writing about Discovery the sooner we can forget it existed. It’s The Acolyte of Star Trek universe.

I’m no fan of Discovery, but… lol the internet summed up in one post ^

Dr. Culber, Captain Burnham, Suru, and Book… These are my favorite characters from Star Trek: Discovery and in that order. So, I’m really going to miss Dr. Culber and would love for him to pop up in some other Star Trek show or movie. For me he is a dream of Star Trek character. And Wilson is a dreamy human and actor. (Nerdy side note: I’m glad by the end it was clear he is CMO (and Counselor). It was starting to get a little disrespectful for our first queer doctor in Star Trek.)

Doug Jones Discusses Star Trek: Discovery's Legacy & Saru's Possible Future

• Doug Jones brought the beloved character Saru to life for all five seasons of Star Trek: Discovery .
• In season 5, Saru became a Federation Ambassador and played a key role in saving the galaxy.
• Star Trek: Discovery 's hope-filled legacy of bringing conflicting species together in peace resonates with audiences.

Doug Jones starred as Saru for all five seasons of Star Trek: Discovery . On August 27, Star Trek: Discovery - The Final Season and Star Trek: Discovery - The Complete Series are available on DVD and Blu-ray.

Portraying the first Kelpien in Starfleet and getting to create a brand new Star Trek alien race , Doug Jones turned Saru into one of Star Trek: Discovery 's most beloved characters. In Star Trek: Discovery season 5, Saru became a Federation Ambassador and played a key role in saving the galaxy once more. Saru also married his Vulcan love, President T'Rina (Tara Rosling) at the end of Star Trek: Discovery season 5.

Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 Finale Ending & Shocking Epilogue Explained

Star Trek: Discovery comes to an end with season 5's finale wrapping up the Progenitors treasure hunt and an epilogue concluding the entire series.

Screen Rant had the pleasure of chatting with Doug Jones, who looked back on his favorite Star Trek: Discovery memories and considered what Saru's Star Trek future could be.

Doug Jones' Favorite Star Trek: Discovery Moment After 5 Seasons

"were quite touched by saru's storyline when he went through vahar'ai.".

Screen Rant: Congratulations again on five incredible seasons of Star Trek: Discovery . I don't think I've ever asked you this: Do you have a particular season of Discovery that stands out as your favorite?

Doug Jones: Oh, wow. I have favorite moments that appear in certain seasons. Going back to season 2, I think a favorite moment of mine that has stood out to me personally, and a lot of fans out there too were quite touched by Saru's storyline when he went through Vahar'ai. He's born into this prey species that is living in fear all the time, and the predator species culls us and kills us off before we go through Vahar'ai, where our threat ganglia get inflamed and we get sickly. And what we don't know is that for generations and centuries, they have us duped into thinking that that's the end of our lives, and they'll do a mercy killing for us. When in actuality, that is where a Kelpien goes through adolescence and has a whole long adult life ahead of them, and our threat ganglia are replaced with quills that can shoot poisonous darts into people. So we are stronger and more mighty than we thought. So realizing that he's away from the predator species on a starship now as a part of Starfleet, he's the only Kelpein who's ever done so. So he's going through Vahar'ai alone, and discovers this new life on his own. And now he has a quest to go back to his home planet and liberate everybody from the dominion that they're living under. The Ba'ul. They were evil to do that to us, but now he went back, not to obliterate the Ba'ul, but he was very diplomatic in bringing them together, the two species together, to live in harmony and peace, finally. So that was a special moment for me, that season two could accomplish all of that.

What Would Saru & T'Rina's Children Look Like?

Screen Rant: Yeah, that really was an amazing storyline for Saru that really changed and evolved the character in fantastic new ways. Saru and T'Rina, of course, got married at the end of the series. Are you curious what Saru and T'Rina's children would look like? Whose genes are dominant?

Doug Jones: Inner species relation do bring up this question. What would our kids look like? And I'll tell you, there is a fan slash cosplayer out there named Missy, Missy has shown up at conventions as what they call a Kelpican. So it's part Kelpien, part Vulcan, it was kind of a blend. A little mash-up that kind of worked. It was not unattractive.

Screen Rant: I have a vision of pointed ears that can shoot quills.

Doug Jones: Right? (laughs)

Hope Is Star Trek: Discovery's Legacy

"We face peril, but we get through it with diplomacy."

Screen Rant: Deep Space Nine and Enterprise have been kind of reevaluated, and are even more appreciated now than during their first runs. I feel like Discovery will be the same in a few years. What's something you want future audiences to understand about Discovery, as someone who lived it from start to finish?

Doug Jones: Yeah. I see what you're saying, that it has a life while it's being aired for the first time, and then on further review after binge watching in the future. I think Discovery will find its place as a show of hope in the midst of the entire franchise. Our show brings a lot of hope. Yes, we face peril, but we get through it with diplomacy. We get through it with a peaceful outcome, mostly. And we have conflicting personalities, conflicting species, finding a way to live in peace together. I think that is a message of hope that we all can live with, and we can all take into our hearts. Where the world's going at the moment, and if the world keeps going that direction, our show will hopefully be more and more of a beacon of how it could be.

Screen Rant: Yeah, that's one of the things I loved about Discovery. From the very beginning, it was a reassessment and a reclaiming of what Star Trek and Starfleet meant. And then you guys lived it, jumped into the distant future, and then brought it to a broken Federation. That story, I think, is just spectacular.

Doug Jones: I agree. When we jumped ahead 1000 years to find what's become Federation now, we found it broken up and fledgling. Being a part of the rebuild and the reestablishing of what the Federation can be, and bringing all these planets back together. Like, Earth and Vulcan, now the planet Ni'Var, had left the Federation. Unthinkable in the the previous series and the previous timeline. And now, in the future, they found their own independence and got away from it all. So finding a way to hug everybody back together again was something our show accomplished with grace, I thought.

Would Doug Jones Return As Saru In Star Trek: Starfleet Academy?

Screen Rant: Mary Wiseman, Oded Fehr, and Tig Notaro were announced as part of Starfleet Academy 's cast . Is returning as Saru something you're champing at the bit for, or are you more like, 'You know, guys, take your time and call me a little bit later'?

Doug Jones: Well, you know, I have enjoyed being out of the rubber bits, I'm not gonna lie. I've worn a lot of rubber bits in my career of 38 years. And now, since I took Saru off for the last time, I have had the last year and a half of playing nothing but humans. A lot of humans in various forms. Whether they're good guys, bad guys, funny guys, serious guys, I've been having a great time playing humans. But should someone have need for Saru in Starfleet Academy? I would never say never. That would be a fun guest star to do, for sure, but I haven't gotten the call yet.

Saru: Besides Starfleet Academy , is there any other Star Trek show you fantasize about crossing over as Saru?

Doug Jones: Strange New Worlds is ongoing and that taps into everyone's nostalgia with the Star Trek franchise, it seems. It would be kind of fun to show up in Strange New Worlds, and Saru is already familiar with Captain Pike and with Spock. We already had our interactions in season two of Discovery, where they launched from. So a nice little reunion would be kind of fun. He has to travel through time backward, though, to do that because we jumped ahead 1000 years.

About Star Trek: Discovery Season 5

The fifth and final season of Star Trek: Discovery finds Captain Burnham and the crew of the USS Discovery uncovering a mystery that will send them on an epic adventure across the galaxy to find an ancient power whose very existence has been deliberately hidden for centuries. But there are others on the hunt as well … dangerous foes who are desperate to claim the prize for themselves and will stop at nothing to get it.

Check out our other Star Trek: Discovery season 5 interviews here:

• Sonequa Martin-Green
• David Ajala and Doug Jones
• Wilson Cruz, Mary Wiseman & Blu del Barrio
• Alex Kurtzman and Michelle Paradise
• Callum Keith Rennie
• Eve Harlow and Elias Toufexis
• David Ajala
• Mary Wiseman
• Elias Toufexis
• Jonathan Frakes
• Michelle Paradise
• Anthony Tran

Star Trek: Discovery - The Final Season and Star Trek: Discovery - The Complete Series are available on DVD and Blu-ray on August 27.

Star Trek: Discovery

Cast Blu del Barrio, Oded Fehr, Anthony Rapp, Sonequa Martin-Green, Doug Jones, Wilson Cruz, Eve Harlow, Mary Wiseman, Callum Keith Rennie

Streaming Service(s) Paramount+

Franchise(s) Star Trek

Writers Alex Kurtzman

Directors Jonathan Frakes, Olatunde Osunsanmi

Showrunner Alex Kurtzman

Where To Watch Paramount+

Boldly Go: 25 Hilarious Star Trek Memes Only True Fans Will Understand

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The Acolyte's Cancellation Shows That Star Wars Isn't Interested In Changing

The acolyte is proof that star wars needs fewer fans at the helm, no one hates star wars like star wars fans.

The Star Trek universe has been around since 1966, and since we first saw Kirk tooling around the galaxy, chewing the scenery no man has chewed before, it has spun outwards into seven television series, thirteen movies and more merchandise than a replicator can handle. With 50+ years under its’ belt, this is a franchise that has attracted fans old and young, from all walks of life, to gather together, marvel at the intricacies of this utopian universe, and to poke holes in it whenever they can.

You can’t really live that long and expect to be beyond reproach. When you have a science fiction universe that has existed longer than most cars people own, you are going to have people that have scrutinized every little aspect of it, and found some things worth laughing at, and the internet being the wonderful place that it is, we share those hilarious findings with one another. But we don’t share them like animals, with a few succinct words or well-reasoned arguments. Those are the tools of a bygone era. No, here in the future, we need to share our irreverent humor via comics, images and mostly memes.

And until we all share a collective consciousness like the Borg, we have to go out and find those jokes ourselves. Or, even better, we find people to compile articles full of those jokes for us, which is what I am about to present to you. Set your phasers to funny, because things are about to get ridiculous.

25 I'm A Doctor, Not A Paleontologist!

I really laughed a lot harder than I should have at this meme. I don’t know what it is, I think it was just because it confused me so much at first. When it says “Bones” is it talking about McCoy or what he’s looking at? Is Leonard saying it? Because the next line makes it seem like he’s giving his professional medical opinion on what is clearly a very old skeleton, which is funny in its’ own right.

Whatever the case may be, the execution of the image is flawless, since McCoy has to use that exact phrase far too many times in the show. It also might be a slight jab at Kirk for needing the help of his crew member to ascertain whether a skeleton is dead or not, which is pretty accurate, Kirk does get through most scenarios by the skin of his teeth and the minds of the better crew members around him.

24 Those Legs Go All The Way Up?

When I started writing this article I had no idea I would be getting such an eyeful of Patrick Stewart’s shapely man calf. Can’t say I’m disappointed, though, those are some toned legs for a guy who spends 95% of his day drinking tea. Earl Grey. Hot. Patrick has always had that “I can’t tell if he’s a tough guy who’s nerdy or a nerd who might be tough” kind of vibe going for him.

What I especially love about images such as these is that they correct a huge oversight in the original series. Why were the females of the crew the only ones subjected to wearing skirts? That’s some archaic hogwash I’d expect at my local Hooters, not aboard a Starfleet vessel. So when pictures like this show that both men and women had the option of wearing skirts, it gladdens my heart a little. Plus, you know, those calves, dude.

23 Remind Me To Buy More Red Shirts

There’s a lot of beauty to behold in this picture. There’s the gloriousness of the V-neck that Kirk is rocking, the line up of disposable human beings who all look like they KNOW they are disposable, and the fact that everyone is laughing except Spock. As always. And overtop of all the splendor these images have managed to capture, there’s the whole punch line, which is actually pretty funny, for a meme.

The implication that the super-civilized Starfleet captain, who lives in a utopian society and believes that violence is the last resort, knows that his red shirt crew will be killed is kind of hilarious. Everyone knows the trope that red shirts get super murdered when they are part of the landing party, but for Kirk to be in on the joke adds a fun little dark layer to the whole experience. I always knew Kirk had a dark streak to him.

22 Set Your Phasers To Dig

Man, red shirts just cannot seem to catch a break. Between them and Stormtroopers, all of space seems to be cluttered with useless cannon fodder. You’d think that after the first few times they sent people down to get eaten by space bugs, they’d start wearing spacesuits or armor. But no, they always go down in brightly colored uniforms that get torn apart by a slight breeze, and next thing you know, the Captain is saying a brief sentence about what a shame it is to lose life so senselessly. Then they are on to their next adventure where they find a sentient gas thingy maybe.

The real question I have is where do they keep getting crew members? I understand that the Enterprise can hold around 430 people, but that number should drastically drop if you lose people every time you send out an away party. And that isn’t counting all the times crew members get lost in the transporter or sucked dry by an iron absorbing vampire creature.

21 The USS Billy Corgan

It looks like this pumpkin landing party has had a transporter malfunction, which is never pretty. Oh well, it only happened to a redshirt. Seriously, though, how many people are going to make the same joke? We get it, they have a very low surviving rate, change the record, please.

At least this one was a little more creative, since it decided to eschew using words at all, and decided to just let the paint on the pumpkins act as all the clues you’d need to figure out the joke. Still, you have to wonder, is retelling the same joke that every nerd has heard a thousand times really worth exploding a perfectly good pumpkin? That could have been turned into a delicious pie, man.

I also wonder why they decided to use two different versions of the Starfleet symbol. Is there another layer to the joke that I’m missing?

20 Sure You Do

Worf, one of the only Klingons to joining Starfleet Academy, was always presented as a kind of tough guy who acts before he thinks. He always wanted to show off his warrior’s strength, boasting of his exploits and desiring to end all things with bloody combat. That’s what he was supposed to be, conceptually, I suppose.

In reality, I don’t think I can remember Worf every being intimidating except for that one time he took out some Borg in the cold of space, which is admittedly pretty awesome. That aside, most of his run in The Next Generation involved him growling at people before making a complete fool of himself. I’m next to certain I’ve seen every member except for Wesley beat him up. Oh, I don’t even need to guess, here’s a supercut of Worf failing at everything he undertakes . I’m glad I’m not the only one who noticed how much he sucks.

19 "Passed"

Star Trek did a heck of a lot with very little budget. They had those gross throbbing veins in the side of the aliens head in The Menagerie . Spock’s blue eye shadow was to die for. Heck, when they traveled through space, those stars passing by looked incredible. I can’t imagine how much of the special effects budget went into Shatner’s girdle.

So when they were blowing our minds with other stellar uses of a limited television budget, they had to cut corners in other areas. Here they went full Grinch and just strapped a single horn to the top of a dogs head. And hey, I’ve never been to the far reaches of space, so I can’t exactly comment on how accurate this is or isn’t, so maybe there is a sad, stupid creature out there that looks like this. Not everything you run into is going to be as cool as the Gorn or Balok.

18 We're Living In The Future!

I always found the Replicators on  Star Trek kind of a cheat.  Due to their ability to turn energy into matter, and since energy was never in shortage due to antimatter and dark energy or whatever, there was never a short supply of anything.  The Replicator is part of the reason that The Federation can live in a time of such prosperity; they live in a world where scarcity is no longer a thing. If everyone has the ability to have whatever they truly need at their fingertips, there is no more conflict for resources, or even trade deals that allow people to become rich for little work.

The 3D printer is definitely a step in the right direction if that’s the kind of future we are all envisioning. A device that can sit in your home and provide you with a basic structure of something you need. Sure, they take up way more materials than a Replicator, and sure, the blueprints for everything aren’t stored in their databanks, but it feels like it is within our grasp. Heck, they 3D printed a human heart , which is already pretty much science fiction become fact.

17 Even In The Future, Accents Are Funny

Do you want to know something weird? Did you know that they added Chekov in the second season as a way to make it more appealing to younger audiences and women? Yeah, I don’t see it either, and I always assumed he was shoehorned in the as a way to suggest that the Cold War would eventually end peacefully, with all humans becoming allies in the end. To me, that makes more sense than him being a girl magnet.

What other reason would they make an actor put on a ridiculous Russian accent? This isn’t to suggest that all Russian accents are silly, but rather that Walter Koenig, who played Chekov, never quite nailed an accurate Russian accent and so it always seemed like he was really sinking his teeth into all the “w”s. What may have been a poor casting choice at the time has spun into a lasting joke that persists even in modern iterations, with the late Anton Yelchin’s portrayal of Chekov struggling with voice commands through his thick accent.

16 Feline Ka-if-fee

Yes, I understand that if you don’t know what music the person is talking about, that image is complete gibberish. I’m here for you, here’s a link to the scene this is referencing. It’s a fairly classic Star Trek scene where one of Spock’s bizarre Vulcan rituals blows up in Kirk’s face and they end up fighting each other with disastrously impractical weapons. I know I’m making fun of it here, but honestly, it is a great scene. Shatner’s acting in this episode and scene is actually a kind of humble, approachable everyman for once, acknowledging that he’s doing something for his friend Spock. It’s fun seeing Kirk when he realizes he has bitten off more than he can chew.

What also makes this image work for me is that there are people across the globe that hear that particular music whenever they see any two combatants square off against each other. That’s how you know that your television show has been a hit, when people associate it when it really has no bearing on what they are looking at.

15 To Heck With Continuity

Star Trek Discovery has been pretty divisive so far, but what isn’t lately? Look at how much people hate each other over the election results or the stone cold fact that The Last Jedi is a good film. I think it comes down to the fact that we are in this weird period in civilization where we don’t want exact copies of things, but we don’t want them to be too different either. So when Discovery introduced a new makeup layout for Klingons, it ruffled people’s feathers.

I couldn’t tell you why, though. As the image illustrates, Klingons have already had a few changes, so why not just keep going with it. You shouldn’t limit yourself because of fan service, you should utilize all of the newest special effects at your disposal. I for one think the new Klingon design is superb, because it actually looks more like a being from another planet and not just a guy with papier maché on his forehead.

14 The Captain Is Compromised

Come to think of it, I can’t actually recall if I have ever seen Kirk put anything in the “Captain’s Log” or if it was just a series of voiceovers. I’m sure some super dedicated fan out there is itching to tell me just when and where we can see Kirk feverishly writing down his encounters with the Mirror Dimension in the log, but honestly, I don’t have time for that.

What would be even better than Kirk coming apart mentally and developing inner voices would be if he was genuinely saying these things out loud, but with no idea that he’s doing it. He’s just walking down the halls of the Enterprise, talking about how he isn’t sure how they will get out of this, and some yeoman just sees their trusted captain talking to himself like a nut. Heck, maybe it would lead to a mutiny! There can never be enough space mutinies.

13 My Tricorder Is Detecting That You Have No Taste

I’ll be the first to admit that the Star Trek universe is heavily flawed. In fact I’m kind of banking on those flaws for a lot of this article, so I’m kind of grateful for them. That being said, the flaws are kind of what give it the flavor it has, and despite those easily overlooked f;aws, it is a remarkable franchise. It broke down barriers of racism, it showed a society that was motivated by the betterment of fellow beings and not just the pursuit of wealth, and it showed us that even if you try to resolve things peacefully, sometimes you still get to use Photon Torpedoes.

So what isn’t to like? I think most people that say they don’t like Star Trek are just those dogmatic meatheads that think that showing any interest in something as dorky as science fiction will be an affront for the carefully constructed façade that is their own bravado.

12 Barking Up The Wrong Tree

I think we have all made a dingus out of ourselves at one time or another by trying to flirt with someone who played for a team that wasn’t interested in you. Heaven knows why we get so embarrassed, it isn’t even a full out rejection because we are ugly, we just aren’t what the person is in to. But embarrassed we get, and imagine how embarrassed Uhura will be when she finds out how Sulu rolls.

George Takei has been a very vocal proponent of the LGBTQ community for years, and is seen as something of a gay icon nowadays. I’m not so sure he was as open about it back when Star Trek was first on the air, since it was a different climate of tolerance, so having chemistry between him and Uhura seemed perfectly plausible at the time. Hindsight is 20/20, as they say.

11 Can You Hear Me Now?

Depending on who you ask, puns are either the highest or lowest form of comedy. Wherever you stand on them, you have to give the author if this one some credit, because it’s a two for one. I feel like I will diminish the comedy if I break down how the wordplay works here, but I have confidence that these articles only attract the most intelligent readers on the Internet, so I’m sure you got how funny it was.

What really tickles my funny bone, though, is that this scene is ridiculous OUTSIDE the premise of the pun and meme. Inside of the show, it doesn’t make a lick of sense why Data would have a phone built into his stomach, let alone a ROTARY phone. I’m not even going to research the context of the image, because I can tell you right now, it’s going to have something to do with the holodeck malfunctioning, which it does every three episodes.

10 Fascinating

The crew of the U.S.S. Enterprise went to some wacky places in their five-year mission, and not all of them made sense. I recently watched an episode where they landed on a beautiful world where the events of Alice in Wonderland seemed to be playing out. The whole thing ended up being a sort of intergalactic amusement park, despite the fact that a few crewmembers were killed. The show can be a little silly, is what I’m trying to say.

Luckily for everyone on the Internet, that silliness results in images like this, where we see the impeccable Spock throwing caution to the wind and dressing up like a snapchat filter. It’s nice to see Spock let that bowl cut hair down once in a while, it reminds us that even the most rigid of people are still only human. Or half human, whatever. Just enjoy the picture and stop analyzing everything, will ya’?

9 Set A Course For Fashion

Here’s a fun little piece of trivia for you: when Gene Roddenberry was working on Star Trek: The Next Generation he hated the casting of Patrick Stewart as Jean-Luc Picard. His reasoning was that nobody would want to see a bald captain. There are even pictures out there of the early filming days when he forced Stewart to wear a wig. Go ahead and look it up. Luckily, they managed to convince Gene that in the future, people would be enlightened enough to not care about baldness as much as we do now in out superficial society.

I’m not exactly sure how I was going to transition that factoid into a funny comment about the crew wearing hats, but we are here now. If Gene was so hung up on Picard looking like a goof because of a bit of shine on the top of his head, why wouldn’t he nix a scene where everyone looks like they are about to play hacky sack?

8 Shoot For The Stars

The first time I saw a meme like this, it was actually about Batman. That’s a goal that seems a little more unattainable, since Batman is an inherited billionaire and Kirk is a self-made man that rose up through the ranks of Starfleet Academy, mostly by cheating at the Kobayashi Maru test. So yes, I suppose it is better both logistically and morally to strive to be Captain Kirk and not Batman.

By why stop there? This is the realm of fiction, you can strive to be literally anyone. Preferably someone who isn’t a womanizing yahoo that routinely puts the lives of his crew in mortal danger on a hunch. Janeway never pulled that nonsense, why not be her? Heck, why not try to be someone who really knows how to be the moral superior while cruising recklessly through space? Why not attempt to be The Doctor, who is also self-made and arguably might have the bigger ship.

7 That Just Might Work!

When it comes to the structure of using technobabble and Applied Phlebtonium in Star Trek , I think Futurama actually summarized it best:

Fry : Usually on the show, they came up with a complicated plan, then explained it with a simple analogy.

Leela : Hmmm... If we can re-route engine power through the primary weapons and configure them to Melllvar's frequency, that should overload his electro-quantum structure.

Bender : Like putting too much air in a balloon!

Fry : Of course! It's all so simple!

Since us, the audience with our primitive analog minds, couldn’t keep up with the technology of the future, all they had to do was string together a series of scientific sounding words and we would just nod along with our mouths agape. The most commonly used jargon was the reversing of the polarities, which could literally be used to do anything, from making your shields more durable to making yourself invisible to scans.

6 A Way Of Her Own

I’m not sure if this meme is trying to compliment or insult Janeway. On the one hand, she’s a commanding presence who manages to think her way out of most scenarios. On the other hand, she got her crew lost n the other side of the galaxy, and kept them that way for an extended period of time. Plus I think she got turned into a slug in an episode? I may be remembering that wrong.

Whatever the intended purpose of the image was, it’s pretty accurate in my mind. She always did things her own way, not in a smarmy, egotistical way like Kirk, not in a no-nonsense way like Picard, but with a delicate but intelligent touch that only she can pull off. Plus she always had stellar hair, which must be hard to pull off when your ship is perpetually running low on every conceivable resource.

How Star Trek: Discovery Recaptured One Aspect Of The Original Series

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Star Trek Discovery: 9 Best Episodes (So Far)

Bosch: legacy season 3 needs to build on this important new relationship, these labor day tv deals will save you over $1,000 on best-rated 4k, oled, and fire tvs.

When the original Star Trek first hit screens back in 1966, the concept was pitched to audiences as "a wagon train to the stars." The Enterprise and its crew were soaring off into an unknown, unexplored universe, not unlike the explorers of the old Wild West. There were no rules out here in the vast expanse of space, and even Starfleet protocol was still in its infancy. Kirk, Spock, and the rest often had to improvise to get out of dangerous situations with their lives.

But as the franchise grew, so did the in-universe institutions of Starfleet and the United Federation of Planets . Treaties were signed, conflicts broke out, negotiations ensued, terms were settled — and the cycle began again. Starfleet's mission of exploration became more strictly defined, and so too did its rules and regulations. There were fewer unknowns in the galaxy, and by the time of The Next Generation , it was no longer a chaotic place. Starfleet still faced conflict in Deep Space 9 and explored uncharted territory in Voyager , but now, in addition to mysteries and alien threats, there was often bureaucratic red tape and political intrigue to deal with. Through it all, Starfleet and its members were disciplined, confident, and ready to spread a brighter future throughout the galaxy.

These episodes of Star Trek: Discovery are (so far) some of the highlights of the show.

That changed, though, when Michael Burnham and her crew traveled 900 years into the future in the season 2 finale of Star Trek: Discovery . With the time jump at the start of Season 3, Discovery took Star Trek back into a lawless, chaotic galaxy.

The Early Federation: Two Different Sides

For the crew of The Original Series , meeting unknowns face-to-face often meant danger. Hostile aliens didn't always listen to reason, especially since the Federation wasn't quite an interstellar superpower yet. The crew of the Enterprise always had to be prepared to fire phasers set to stun, throw a quick punch to the jaw, or break out the tried-and-true Vulcan nerve pinch.

Michael Burnham and the crew of Discovery also came from the days of the Federation's infancy. But unlike the Enterprise, they weren't charting unknown space. In Season 1, they worked as part of the war effort, helping the Federation fight the Klingons and developing technology to do so. In Season 2, they tracked the seven red signals and tried to thwart the AI called Control.

Of course, there were still plenty of mysteries to uncover and things to learn — the mechanics of time travel , the mysteries of the mycelial network. But Discovery's early themes had less to do with exploring the final frontier. Through their sci-fi concepts, seasons 1 and 2 explored ideas like the ethics of war and the consequences of technological advancement. Other Star Trek shows had done the same before them.

There are plenty of legitimate real-world reasons why the show's creators may have decided on the time jump that Discovery took at the end of its second season. Perhaps the show's retcons were starting to make things complicated . Perhaps they didn't want to eventually overlap with the timeline of The Original Series . Maybe they simply recognized the need and the opportunity to shake things up, to take both the crew and the audience out of their comfort zones. Regardless, it was a bold decision, and one that reintroduced the idea of diving headfirst into the unknown.

How The Burn Reintroduced A Lawless Galaxy

When she lands in the 31st century, Michael Burnham quickly learns that this galaxy is vastly different from the one she left behind. Starfleet is a distant memory, the Federation is a shadow of its former self, and a criminal organization called the Emerald Chain has a chokehold on the majority of resources. All of this is the result of an event known as the Burn , which took place about a century before Discovery's arrival. All the dilithium in the galaxy went inert, and thousands of ships detonated. The result was mass death, and without dilithium, the inability to travel at warp.

After the Burn, interplanetary alliances crumbled, and planets left the United Federation one after another until it was barely a skeleton of what it once was. Its influence weakened, until it was no longer able to maintain law, order, and peace as it once had. With the Federation almost gone, the people of the galaxy were left to fend for themselves. Mercenary groups, smugglers, and independent contractors carved lives for themselves in space. The galaxy was, as it had been in Kirk and Spock's day, a wild frontier.

A World Full Of Unknowns

Michael, Saru, and their crew had to navigate a galaxy which they knew nothing about. The planets, alien species, and even a few of the factions might have familiar names, but they were vastly different from what the Discovery crew remembered. The planet Vulcan had become Ni'Var ; the warring Vulcans and Romulans were cultivating peace between their two societies. The Klingons, whom the Discovery crew remembered as the Federation's greatest enemy, had become their allies and then receded to being strangers again. Many people throughout the galaxy had more or less forgotten the Federation — or even spurned it, holding them partially responsible for the Burn.

Discovery's job, then, was to gather information, build bridges, and forge alliances in their search to solve the mystery of the Burn and restore the Federation to its former glory. Michael, like her brother Spock , had to know when to speak and when to spring into action. Saru, a formerly cautious man who was new to taking risks, had to learn to do so in a measured and calculated way. Tilly learned to take charge; Stamets learned to reach out for help and expertise. Like Kirk and his crewmates, they were thrust into unfamiliar situations time and again. Ultimately, just like in The Original Series, these trials not only brought out the best in the show's characters, but provided an adventure for viewers that was familiar, yet wonderfully refreshing.

Star Trek: Discovery

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'Star Trek: Discovery' cast describes 'bittersweet vibe' of filming after cancellation

NEW YORK, Aug. 27 (UPI) -- Wilson Cruz, Mary Wiseman and Blu del Barrio say they weren't aware Star Trek: Discovery had been canceled while they were filming most of what would become the show's fifth and final season, which will be released on DVD and Blu-ray Tuesday.

"We didn't have the luxury of knowing that these were our last episodes when we were shooting them," Cruz told UPI in a recent Zoom round-table interview with reporters.

"We didn't know," Wiseman agreed. "But we got the opportunity to come back and film some stuff to kind of really make it feel like a series finale. So, the vibe was bittersweet, I would say. Goodbyes aren't just hard. They're kind of difficult to conceive of and don't feel real."

She said she realized the seven-year job was over when the cast and crew, led by cast member Sonequa Martin-Green, clapped for her after she filmed her last scene.

"I felt tears and spit just rocket out of my face," Wiseman recalled. "It was very spontaneous and weird, and that was the moment I think I accepted that it was over."

Del Barrio said they remembered that moment vividly, adding, "I was laughing the entire day."

They added: "i didn't know how to deal with it. I feel like the grieving process for this show has been coming in tiny little moments. It's like 20 seconds of time where it kind of just hits you really hard, and then you might cry for a second, and then it goes away, and then it feels weird again."

Wiseman chimed in, "You're asking that question and I'm like, 'Oh, yeah, it's over.' I'm still realizing that."

Cruz wasn't able to film those additional scenes with his Star Trek family because he already was off filming another project, Mother of the Bride .

"They were gracious enough and lovely enough to call me while I was in Thailand shooting," he said of how his co-stars remotely included him in the emotional farewell.

"They wrecked me and, so, needless to say, the makeup person on that movie was not thrilled, but they made me pretty again."

The sci-fi series follows the space adventures of the crew of the USS Discovery in the 23rd century, about 10 years before the events of the original Star Trek series.

Martin-Green plays the ship's captain, Michael Burnham; Cruz plays Dr. Hugh Culber, a medical officer who was killed and then brought back to life; Wiseman plays Starfleet Academy teacher Sylvia Tilly; and del Barrio plays Adira Tal, a human bonded with an alien Trill symbiont.

Del Barrio said they were proud to play the first non-binary actor playing a non-binary character in the Star Trek franchise.

"I have always been somebody who always thought, at every moment in time, that I know myself really well," del Barrio said.

"This experience has helped me grow in ways that I did not think that I could grow in," they said. "This show helped me kind of open up my mind a little bit and kind of listen to myself and having these people around me as my mentors and my friends also really helped me to do that."

Hugh was married to chief engineer Paul Stamets (Anthony Rapp), making them the first openly gay couple in Star Trek history.

Having worked with Rapp for more than 25 years on various projects, Cruz said he learned that goodbye right then is never goodbye forever.

"He's been a part of my life for this long, he will continue to be, and now all of these amazing people that I've shared this experience with will also be a part of my life," Cruz said, admitting he will miss his everyday interactions with them.

"What I will take away from Discovery is the belief that no matter how hard things get, no matter how difficult a cultural or political moment might be, all we can really control is our responses to that and who we are and, like Culber, if our lives aren't working for us, it doesn't have to take your sudden death for you to realize that you can reinvent yourself.

"You can create the life that you deserve, the love that you deserve, the career that you deserve, just by choosing to do that," Cruz said. "Give yourself that permission."

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Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 Blu-Ray Review: The Final Season's Not Quite Starry Sendoff

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Key Takeaways

• The final season of Star Trek: Discovery on Blu-Ray lacks the magical heights of the show, missing some storytelling opportunities.
• Season 5 features big changes for characters and intricate plot twists that add depth to the evolving narrative.
• The Blu-Ray release offers standard bonus features, but fans may feel let down by the missed potential for more exclusive content.

The final season of Star Trek: Discovery was promoted as a momentous occasion -- and the Blu-Ray release doesn't quite reach those same heights. Star Trek: Discovery - The Final Season comes to Blu-Ray, DVD and digital as a collection that has everything fans will expect, but not enough of the things that make a home video release worthwhile. Especially for the last season of a Star Trek show , it's missing a little bit of magic.

Discovery Season 5 tells a serialized story about a secret "red directive" mission to investigate an 800-year-old Romulan science vessel. When something powerful is stolen off the ship before they arrive, the crew must pursue the couriers who committed the theft and decode the mystery surrounding the starship. The season features several major changes for the characters, which is part of what makes the Blu-Ray edition feel like it could do better.

Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 Aims Understandably High

The final 10 episodes are big in every way, 'not quite ready to say goodbye': star trek: discovery's wilson cruz reflects on series' end.

In an interview with CBR, Star Trek: Discovery actor Wilson Cruz looks back on Hugh Culber's five-season arc across the Star Trek series.

• Olatunde Osunsanmi directs both the season premiere and season finale. Osunsanmi's Discovery credits go all the way back to Season 1, Episode 4, "The Butcher's Knife Cares Not for the Lamb's Cry."
• Season 5 comes to home video just shy of three months after the series finale premiered on Paramount+. The last episode bowed on May 30, 2024.

The fifth season delivers the same kind of storytelling that audiences grew to expect from Discovery over the previous four seasons . It has the same dramatic but ultimately hopeful tone, and characters doing just as much introspection as looking outward into the universe. The choice to do another season-long story arc means that Season 5 can be watched if not entirely caught up, but there's character development and some closure that is less effective for those fans who aren't familiar with the crew's whole journey.

With that in mind, there are plenty of plot twists within Season 5 that not only change the heroes, but change the way the audience considers them. One example is Season 5, Episode 2, "Under the Twin Moons," which reveals the backstory Cleveland "Book" Booker shares with one of the season's new antagonists, Moll. In the very next episode, "Jinaal," Dr. Hugh Culber shares his body with the consciousness of the title character. All of these developments and the self-reflection they prompt are exactly what audiences are used to seeing in final seasons of TV shows. As a long-running story winds down, there's typically a lot of looking back, and Discovery tackles that idea better than most. It truly feels like it's time for the characters to move on.

Rayner: I love the feeling of interrupting something.

The best addition is the arrival of Battlestar Galactica alum Callum Keith Rennie as Captain Rayner, the commanding officer of the USS Antares . By the end of Episode 2, Rayner has joined the crew of Discovery , which introduces a variable within the tight-knit lineup. Rayner also has considerable development throughout the story -- more than one would expect from a character introduced in the final season -- and genre veteran Rennie turns in a strong performance. It's enough to make audiences want to see more of Rayner in the future.

And speaking of the future, it's not a surprise that the whole series ends with a jump forward in time to show fans where folks have ended up, while leaving the door open for what comes next. There's always something next with Star Trek. That hopeful ending and the general themes of Season 5 feel so very familiar, yet it's easy to forgive that because they also feel like they make sense for this particular group of adventurers. If only the Blu-Ray release had explored them just a little bit further.

Discovery's Season 5 Blu-Ray Special Features Are Missing Something

There's plenty of bonus content, but room for more, 'the star trek universe is in very good hands': jonathan frakes bids farewell to star trek: discovery.

In an interview with CBR, Star Trek legend Jonathan Frakes talks about taking the director's chair one last time for Star Trek: Discovery Season 5.

• Paramount Home Entertainment says the Discovery Season 5 Blu-Ray release has "nearly two hours" of special features.
• A Star Trek: Discovery - The Complete Series Blu-Ray and DVD collection is being released concurrently with this standalone Season 5 set.

There's a fine selection of special features available for Star Trek: Discovery 's final voyage. In fact, the set comes with more bonuses than were included in the home video release of Season 4 -- which just had a handful of deleted scenes, a gag reel and some behind-the-scenes footage. But given all that happens across the 10 episodes and wanting to go out on a high, it's a bit surprising that Paramount didn't cram these Blu-Rays full of new material. There's no shortage of subjects to cover.

The gag reel is back for Season 5, but there's only one single deleted scene included, and so it feels relatively inconsequential. The same can be said for a few of the featurettes, which are standard promotional material. "Being Michael Burnham" focuses on Sonequa Martin-Green as Captain Michael Burnham, and the journey Burnham has taken across the whole of Discovery . Burnham certainly deserves an individual spotlight, both in terms of the character's growth and what Martin-Green has done with the character. However, it would have been nice for Paramount to have included some other character-specific features, instead of folding the rest of the crew into more broad features like one simply titled "Character Development," just because there's enough to say about a half-dozen different players.

Michael Burnham: Connection isn't a skill; it's a choice.

While it's awesome that Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 included an audio commentary track, it's likewise disappointing that there's just one, on the series finale "Life, Itself." An episode like "Jinaal" or Season 4, Episode 5, "Mirrors" would have been fun to discuss further. And within the included commentary, Martin-Green and David Ajala are the only cast members. They're joined by showrunner Michelle Paradise and director Olatunde Osunsanmi. The quartet provide a pretty good listen, yet it's impossible not to wish that more actors were involved to offer their stories and thoughts about the final episode, and because it would fit the "found family" feeling that Discovery has captured on-screen. Even considering the logistics of trying to get the actors back to record bonus material, if there's any set that would deserve that extra effort, it's this one.

It's also somewhat surprising that there's not more devoted to the show's place in the larger Star Trek universe. After all, this was the first Trek show to be exclusive to Paramount+, and a very different series in tone and style than most of its predecessors. Plus, this show introduced the character of Philippa Georgiou, who's now headlining Star Trek: Section 31 . That makes this release a prime opportunity to at least put in some trailers, whether it's for Section 31 or the upcoming final season of Star Trek: Lower Decks . Yes, they're available on YouTube, but why not do some easy additional promotion? Or at least take one last opportunity to talk about how Discovery shook up the Star Trek franchise. Season 5 comes to Blu-Ray having completed its mission, but it could have been a truly epic collection.

Star Trek: Discovery - The Final Season is now available on Blu-Ray, DVD and digitally on platforms including Apple TV .

Star Trek: Discovery Season 5 Blu-Ray

• Provides all of the expected special features fans will want.
• Misses opportunities to add even more bonus content.
• Only one commentary track and just one deleted scene.

Screen Rant

Spock vs. spock: star trek’s ethan peck wants “battle to the death” with zachary quinto’s vulcan.

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Star Trek: Every Spock Family Member, Explained

I want strange new worlds to break star trek canon & save captain pike, star trek actors reveal strange new worlds movie “discussion,” crossover with chris pine’s enterprise idea.

Ethan Peck jokes he wants a "battle to the death" between his Lt. Spock from Star Trek: Strange New Worlds and Zachary Quinto's Spock from J.J. Abrams' Star Trek movies. Quinto and Peck inherited the role of Spock from the late Leonard Nimoy. Quinto's alternate Kelvin timeline Spock appeared opposite Nimoy's Prime Spock in Star Trek (2009) and Star Trek Into Darkness . On Star Trek: Strange New Worlds , Ethan Peck plays the younger version of Leonard Nimoy's Spock in Star Trek 's Prime timeline.

Appearing on a panel at Terrificon alongside his Star Trek: Strange New Worlds co-star Celia Rose Gooding, Ethan Peck gave both a humorous answer and a more serious response to a fan question about which Star Trek character from any era he would want Lt. Spock to meet. Peck revealed he would like to share scenes with Brent Spiner's Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation and Star Trek: Picard , but he would like Lt. Spock to fight Zachary Quinto's Commander Spock in "a battle to the death" .

I’m speaking as Spock now. I would like a battle to the death with Kelvin Spock. There can only be one. And this will always be my answer: I think Nimoy’s Spock informed the performance of Brent as Data, who I think informed the performance of me, and I would love to have scenes with Data. Yeah, battle to the death.

Ethan Peck and Zachary Quinto appeared on stage together at the 2023 Star Trek: Las Vegas convention, which marked the first time the two Spock actors met in person.

Spock is one of the most famous characters in Star Trek, and the Vulcan's extended family has made an indelible impact throughout the franchise.

Which Spock Would Win Ethan Peck's Proposed Battle To The Death?

Is there a logical victor.

Contemplating who would win a battle to the death between Ethan Peck's Lt. Spock and Zachary Quinto's Commander Spock is fascinating. For his part, Quinto's Spock has a great deal of combat experience in J.J. Abrams' Star Trek movies, from fighting Romulans with Captain James T. Kirk (Chris Pine) to Spock slugging it out with Khan Noonien Singh (Benedict Cumberbatch). Kelvin Spock also has pent-up rage and trauma from witnessing the destruction of Vulcan and the death of his mother, Amanda Grayson (Winona Ryder).

Ethan Peck jokes there can only be one Spock, but Star Trek is fortunate we have two.

Ethan Peck's Lt. Spock hasn't seen as much warfare as Zachary Quinto's Spock on Star Trek: Strange New Worlds. However, Spock did dream about battling himself on Vulcan in Strange New Worlds season 1's "Spock Amok." Peck's Vulcan has also faced the Gorn and unleashed his human emotions . Like his Kelvin timeline counterpart and Lt. Nyota Uhura (Zoe Saldana), Lt. Spock has also been dumped by Nurse Christine Chapel (Jess Bush). There's no clear way to predict a Spock vs. Spock winner. But while Ethan Peck jokes there can only be one Spock, Star Trek is fortunate we have two.

Source: Terrificon, Fandom Spotlite

Star Trek: Strange New Worlds

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Star Trek Jokes

73 star trek jokes and hilarious star trek puns to laugh out loud. Read jokes about star trek that are clean and suitable for kids and friends.

• Short Star Trek Jokes

Star Trek One Liners

Star trek next generation jokes.

• More Star Trek Jokes

Funniest Star Trek Short Jokes

Short star trek jokes and puns are one of the best ways to have fun with word play in English. The star trek humour may include short trek jokes also.

• What do you call a clever, socially awkward, bisexual hippie with fancy neckwear who streams Star-Trek? A shy, wry, bi guy in a fly tie and tie dye watching sci-fi on wifi. Credits: my bud
• Boy: Dad how come there are no Jews, Christians or Muslims in Star Trek ? Dad: Cause it's the future son
• I accidentally went to Star Trek convention dressed as Chewbacca... It was a Wookie mistake
• What do toilet paper and the USS Enterprise have in common? They both circle uranus looking for Klingons! Happy Star Trek day
• For Star Wars and Star Trek fans A stormtrooper and a red shirt are in a room. The stormtrooper shoots the red shirt, but misses every shot. The red shirt dies anyway.
• I tried to sneak into a Star Trek convention disguised as a Doctor. The Security Guard suspected I was not the Real McCoy.
• I'm a guy who's into Star Wars, Star Trek and Doctor Who. Can you guess what I'm not into right now? A woman.
• I can't decide between Star Trek popsicles or a Star Trek ice cube mold .. both choices have their frozen Khans.
• My libertarian neighbor posted a newspaper ad selling his collection of Star Trek ships. And here I thought he believed in free Enterprise.
• My favorite joke of all time: What do Star Trek and toilet paper have in common? They circle Uranus looking for Klingons.

Share These Star Trek Jokes With Friends

Which star trek one liners are funny enough to crack down and make fun with star trek? I can suggest the ones about star wars and captain kirk.

• Why aren't there any Muslims in Star Trek? Because it's the future
• Where do Star Trek fans work out? At the He's Dead Gym.
• Q. Why does this Star Trek uniform stink? A. William Shatner
• I used to confuse Star Wars with Star Trek. It was a Wookie mistake.
• Have you heard about the new Star Trek Christmas movie? It's The Wreath of Khan
• What did Star Trek teach millions of kids? To boldly split infinitives!
• What do you call an unflushed toilet on the Star Trek Enterprise? Captain's log
• Why do Star Trek fans never grow out of it? They just Klingon to it
• Why are there no Iraqis in Star Trek? Because it's set in the future.
• What was the working title for Star Trek III: The Search for Spock? Finding Nimoy
• What did the Borg's existential brother say (Star Trek)? Existence is futile.
• Why is it hard to break up with a Star Trek fan? Because they are such Kling-ons.
• What's a star trek fans favourite drink? Picardi and Kirk
• The guns in Star Trek didnt actually shoot lasers... They were faux-ton guns.
• Peter Dinklage to play a Borg in new Star Trek film His designation : One of seven.

Here is a list of funny star trek next generation jokes and even better star trek next generation puns that will make you laugh with friends.

• I can't decide if I want to watch the original Star Trek of The Next Generation... I guess you could say I'm stuck between a Spock and a Picard place!
• I once ran into someone dressed as Brent Spiner's character from Star Trek: The Next Generation, and saved all the coordinates so that I could replicate the experience later. I metadata.
• Why did the Star Trek: The Next Generation fans end their relationship? There was no Spock between them.

Related Comedy Topics

• captain kirk
• science fiction
• william shatner
• storm trooper
• interstellar
• star wars day
• sea captain
• galaxy universe

Cheerful Fun Star Trek Jokes to Brighten Your Day with Humor and Joy

What funny jokes about star trek you can tell and make people laugh? An example I can give is a clean science fiction jokes that will for sure put a smile on everyones mouth and help you make star trek pranks.

What's Gillian McKeith's favourite part of Star Trek

Captain's Log

I should stay up until 3 in the morning more often

I want to make a show with the two actors who have played Khan in the different Star Trek films where we discuss literature. We will call it "Prose and Khans".

Teacher said this one in class....Why are there no Muslims in Star Trek?

Because it's the future.

Why did the trekkie spit out her latte at the Star Trek Convention?

Cause William Shatner Coffee. hahahha

What's the connection between the Star Trek Enterprise and toilet paper?

They both travel around Uranus looking for Klingons.

Star trek predicting future technology?

How do we know apple won't be around long? Because Captain Picard uses an android.

They should make Star Trek toilet paper...

...so you can help wipe Klingons off Uranus. (been a while since this one's been around. Just heard it again today from my 5 year old niece)

Star Trek Discovery is going to have a female lead which will ruin the series.

The male captains wandered around aimlessly getting into trouble. She will just ask for directions and head straight to the destination.

What did Spock find in the toilet of the USS Enterprise?

**The Captain's log.** - Bonus Trekkie Joke: *Why is Star Trek like the toilet paper in there?* ... because it keeps searching Uranus for Klingons.

I don't always s**... hispanic Star Trek fans...

but when I do, I prefer dos Trekkies

What's the most interesting beer served at the star trek swingers convention?

Dos trekkies.

No one in the Star Trek universe knows how to tie a neck tie .

They're all use to Klingons.

Why are there no Mexicans in Star Trek?

They don't work in the future either.

I had to break up with my girlfriend, she doesn't like Star Trek.

I told her I need some space.

I don't get the hype about the new Star Trek Discovery

Why are people so excited about a new STD series?

What does Star Trek and toilet paper have in common?

This one might be a stretch.

Which Star Trek character do cleaners hate the most? Mister Spock Missed a spot... yah. :'(

Only h**... Star Trek fans know Zefram Cochrane's real name.

Zefram Katsopolis.

My Girlfriend is super obsessed with Star Trek...

So one day we went rock climbing and we were talking about species, I asked her: "How many can you name?" She gave me a grin and said "Roluman, Bajoran, Cardassian, Ferengi, Borg..." She got preoccupied and fell to the bottom of the cliff. "You forgot to Kling-On!"

Why did the starship captain buy a sub-lightspeed propulsion system that he didn't need?

It was an impulse purchase. For anyone who isn't aware, this is a star trek fathers day joke.

What does the enterprise from star trek, and toilet paper have in common

They both fly arround Uranus picking off clingons

Star Trek fans always expect a gift when going to a convention.

They call it the Enter prize

What do you call a clever, socially awkward, bi s**... Hippie with fancy neckwear who streams Star-Trek?

A shy, wry, bi guy in a fly tie watching sci-fi on wifi.

Heard this sub has a lot of Star Trek fans. Did you guys know that to cut down on costs, a lot of the cast and crew camped outside in tents while filming the outdoor scenes in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn? I just snagged one on eBay!

Yeah, so anyways - I thought you guys would appreciate my original Kahn tent.

The original actor who played Captain Kirk tried to start a Star Trek themed line of women's l**....

But no one would invest in Shatner p**.... (An oldie, but deserved a fresh posting)

What does star trek and toilet paper have in common

They both circle Uranus looking for klingons

Stand up Comedy on Star Trek

Yo mamma so fat… she tried to use the teleporter, but it ran out of atoms before she made it to the other side

What's the difference between a Cardassian and a Kardashian?

One is a vicious, opportunistic race, bent on subjugation and d**... through whatever insidious and ethically-questionable means they have at hand. The other is a fictional race from Star Trek.

Fun fact: In Star Trek canon, Captain Kirk has three ears. . .

He has a left ear, a right ear, and SPACE: THE FINAL FRONT EAR.

My wife said she would divorce me if I kept quoting Star Trek.

So I said, "Number Two, make it so!"

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